Coke, Jeans, and Annoying Snape
by darkprediction
Summary: What do you get when you cross a strange seventh year Gryffindor, A list of ways to annoy Snape, and Snape himself? Well, you just get another annoying Snape story..Nothing special. But read it anyways. It's my first fic.FINISHED!
1. chapter one

Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with Harry Potter. J.K. Rowling does! I do however own my made up character, Dark.

Another disclaimer: I wrote the story based on a lits I found somewhere on the internet. I did NOT write the list: 101 ways to annoy Snape.

( Author's note: This is my first attempt at writing a fanfic. I started it a while ago, and decided to put it online. I have a made up character, and I'm trying not to make her a Mary-Sue. Please read this and bear with me!...Also, about Dark, that's just a name that I usually use on RP's ans stuff. As for her last name, Smith, it's just a common last name.)

Dakota Smith pulled the dark brown hair out of her lilac eyes with one of her hands. She had never really liked being in Gryffindor house before. For most of her school career, she had wished she was in Ravenclaw. It was only last year that she made some real Gryffindor friends. Quite a few too. It wasn't the best reason to be acquainted to people either, but that's what's funny about fate... if you believe in such a thing.   
  
Dakota, or Dark as she preferred to be called, met her new friends because of the re-appearance of Voldemort. You see, Dark's father worked for the American wizarding government. He was sort of like an ambassador to the British ministry of magic. Luckily for Dark, this got her into Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, instead of Salem School of Sorcery, in Salem. Even though Dark was from Salem Massachusetts, where there was a big wizarding community, she always wanted to go to Hogwarts. She was glad that Professor Dumbledore was so kind to let her.   
  
At the moment, Dark was packing her school trunk. She couldn't wait to get back to Hogwarts for her seventh year. She wanted to get out of Grimuald Place so badly. She didn't hate Grimuald Place, that was where she met her friends when her parents joined the Order of the Phoenix. The thing was, it was too boring there. Especially now that Sirius was gone. Dark and Sirius had gotten along very well. Thinking about him was still a little painful, so she tried to avoid it. It was a very difficult thing to do, since she was in his house. That was why she was glad to have friends there. True, they were a bit younger than she, well, Fred and George weren't, but they were nice to her, and that was all that mattered.   
  
So, Dark sifted through her piles of junk, deciding on what to pack. School clothes, Spell books, potions ingredients and cauldron, jeans, lots of jeans! T-shirts, comic books, manga books, and not to forget, her collection of sketchbooks. She had used so many, that she had to label what years they were used in. She only packed the recent ones and the one she was currently using, though.   
  
While packing, Dark was lost in thought. Her last year at Hogwarts. She had kept her toes in line for six years. ( Well, she never got caught for anything, that is.) She really wanted her seventh year to be something to remember. As if it were on que, the solution to her problem was solved. She found the perfect way to go out with a bang. It was the list that she wrote with Fred, George, and Sirius ( he helped just a bit) last summer. A list titled, " 101 Ways To Annoy Snape"  
  
"Perfect" She said to herself. It wasn't that she had much against Snape. She was very skilled in potion making, to tell the truth. She was just sick of him treating her like less of a person just because she was in Gryffindor. It wasn't like she wanted to be in that house in the first place.  
  
Dark finished packing her things and ventured to the kitchen. It was near dinner time, anyways. When she got there Mrs. Weasley was almost done cooking dinner. Dark helped her by setting the table. She figured it should get done before Tonks got there.   
  
After dinner, Dark went upstairs with her friends, Hermione, Harry, Ron, and Ginny. They all thought that the list was a great idea, even Hermione, and that was saying something. They spent their trip on the Hogwarts Express laughing about all the possibilities. Dark decided to wait a while before starting the pranks. She didn't want to bring up suspicions too early.

-

( Ok, so there's chapter one. Short, I know. Tell me what you think! I done good?)


	2. chapter two

( Disclaimer: Don't own Harry Potter or anything to do with it.)

For the first week of the term Dark had spent her time plotting her first move. She read and re-read the list to see which task would be best for starting with. She wanted something that wouldn't point any suspicions to her...yet. She finally decided to choose "wolf howl from a good hiding place." It would be funny to see Snape's reaction to that. She announced her choice to the others on Friday morning. She would borrow Harry's map, but not his invisibility cloak. The cloak could fall off or something.   
  
Dark was feeling exited about her first task as she dumped a load of sugar in her coffee.   
  
"Would you like some coffee with your sugar?" asked Hermione. "You are going to be a bigger spaz than usual if you keep that up."  
  
"I'm not sure if that's a good or bad thing" joked Harry.  
  
Dark sipped her coffee and shuddered. The others looked at her.  
  
" Ugh, coffee's way too sweet..."   
  
Everybody finished their breakfast and left for class. Dark was jittery through her lessons, but it wasn't the coffee. She was afraid she'd get caught while pulling her prank. That night at nine o' clock, Ron, who was watching the map, spotted Professor Snape patrolling the corridors. They all bid Dark farewell as she put a dissilusionment charm on herself (a good hiding place!) and left the Gryffindor common room. Dark walked silently through the halls. She was glad that the only thing on her feet were her socks, because they really helped quiet her footsteps. When she finally caught up with Snape she stopped. He was facing her but she was invisible so he didn't see her. She waved. No reaction. She made a face at him. He glanced out the window and continued pacing back and forth patrolling the corridor. Dark waited until he was at the far end of the hall. Then she took a silent breath and howled like a werewolf. Snape must have jumped at least a mile into the air. He looked around wildly and put his arms out like he was feeling around for his invisible howler. Dark was biting her finger trying not to laugh because he looked like a very confused person trying to play marco-polo without a swimming pool.  
  
"Who is there???" he demanded.   
  
Dark couldn't resist.   
  
"POLO!!!!!!!" she cried and ran with Snape on her tail. Professor Snape must have suspected a Gryffindor was behind this, because he ran all the way up to Gryffindor tower. Dark ran past the portriat of the fat lady and to the end of the corridor. When Professor Snape asked the fat lady if she saw a student was out of bed, Dark blew a big rasberry and waited 'till Snape was out of site to go to the fat lady. Dark muttered the password (Nitwit)   
  
"Who is that?" asked the fat lady as she swung open. " You could have gotten in a lot of trouble."  
  
"Then keep it a secret! I was never here." answered Dark as she climbed into the common room.  
  
When Dark entered the common room and became visible again, all of her friends greeted her with cheers. Ginny pointed out that the list had checked itself off. Dark told them everything that happened and they all had a good laugh before bed.  
  
The next morning at breakfast, Snape looked absolutely pissed. Dark couldn't stop smiling even though Snape might catch her triumphant look. Wait, it seemed he just did. Dark thought up a lie as Harry muttered, " Big git approaching."  
  
" Miss Smith, you look especially happy this morning......" He glared at her with his dark eyes.....Deep, dark......yummy-  
  
"no! Bad! Stop!" thought Dark..."that was weird, why'd i even Think that?!?!?" she wondered.  
  
Dark smiled more widely "It's Sartuday, Sir! Who doesn't enjoy a day off?"  
  
Professor Snape muttered something and stalked away. Dark was still kicking herself for that weird mental slip up. She was also looking up to her next task.. this was fun!  
  
"So what do you have in store next?" asked Ron eagerly.  
  
"Wait and find out!" Grinned Dark.   
  
Hermione laughed and asked "Does that mean you have no clue?" Dark answered with a nod and left to go outside. The weather was nice.

( Another short chapter. Thanks if you reviewed!)


	3. chapter three

( There's a little bit of Snape's POV in this chapter. I've allready wrote the first 11 chapters on this story, but I tink that I made Snape a tiny bit out of character. I'm going to work on that.?

Dark made her way to the big tree by the lake. She dipped her feet in and watched the white clouds drift by. She sighed as she thought about having to leave Hogwarts. She loved everything about this place.... well, maybe not the homework part. Her thoughts then came to Snape. What was it that she felt this morning? " Ah well," she thought. "I have more important things to care about. But she knew she was only saying that, and didn't mean it. Dark was never good at trying to forget things. Worrying was one of her bad habits. And she was now worried that she was insane.... I mean more insane. Or worse! A crush on her potions professor!! Her thoughts were suddenly interrupted by a voice.   
  
"Hey, what ya doin?" It was Ginny. She was lookin down at her from a tree branch that she was sitting on.  
  
Dark jumped. "Holy crap Gins! where did you come from? " she asked, still a little startled.  
  
Ginny apologised and said " Well i saw you spacin out and decided to see what was up. You look distracted."  
  
"And you sound like my mom" Dark joked. " But i dunno, I've got a lot on my mind. First of all this is my last year here."  
  
" Hm, well that I can understand, but is there anything else?" Ginny asked.   
  
Dark just looked at her for a moment and said " I couldn't say right now. "Hey look. It's 'Mione." Hermione was heading towards them. She had what looked liked three bottles. It was. Somehow she had managed to get three bottles of butterbeer. She explained that she Packed some in her school trunk.   
  
" I did the same thing." said Dark " but not with butterbeer." she grinned.   
  
The three girls stayed out by the lake until it started to get darker outside. They headed towards the castle for dinner, stomaches rumbling. They forgot about lunch. That night Dark sat cross legged on her bed, reading over her list. She'd make her next move tomorrow, but what would she do. In the meantime, she pulled out, as she said earlier, a bottle. It wasn't butterbeer, but a bottle of Coca Cola. Hey, what did you think she was going to bring?? She thought about her list as she slowly drank her Coke. Yum, it was the cherry kind.  
  
Severus Snape sat in his private quarters on a cozy armchair. Suprisingly it wasn't black, and no, there weren't chains and implements of torture in sight, as many of the students believed. Snape was thinking about the past events of the week. He scared some first years (little buggers deserved it), graded papers, and.... was howled at. But who was it? He had his suspicions, but it wasn't Potter. It was a female voice for sure.   
  
"who, who, WHO???" Severus snapped out of nowhere. He blinked.  
  
" You know, that is a good sign of insanity right there..." A portriat of the former head of slytherin drawled from another room.  
  
" It was probably Smith, he thought. Yes, she looked quite triumphant this morning, but then again, she is a strange one. She could have just been being stupid...but she isn't stupid" He reminded himself.  
  
This was true. She was no Granger, but unlike Miss Granger, who was good at everything through books and study, Miss Smith had potential, at least at potions. He was not calling her a genius, she wasn't some braniac, but she was gifted in potions.  
  
Oh well, he'd just keep an eye on her, just incase.....  
  
Snape got up and put the book he wasn't really reading away. Yawning, he crawled into bed.  
  
Dark put drink and list away. She got under her covers and fell asleep. She had some weird dreams that all had to do with Snape.....and, uh, detentions wink..........Hmm must have been the coke...  
  
The next morning was Sunday. She woke up and stretched her feet. Then it came to her. She knew what to do next!

( Hooray for cherry coke.)


	4. chapter four

(Thank you if you reviewed. On with chapter three!)

After pulling on yesterday's jeans and a new T-shirt, Dark made her way to the common room.   
  
" Good morning my lovelies!" She called to Harry, Ron, and 'Mione. They waved to her and she sat down with them. Dark took out the sacred list and unrolled it on the table between them she pointed to a task which read: '92. Transfigure his robes into comic-book super-hero style tights, cape, logo and utility belt'   
  
" That's brilliant, Dark," said Harry, who was farmilliar with muggle super heroes. 'Mione was grinning, because she did too. Ron on the other hand looked as though he needed an explination. While Harry told Ron about super heroes, 'Mione asked,   
  
"So, which hero will it be?"   
  
Dark looked pensive for a moment, and then said. " How about Spiderman?" Hermione giggled. "That would be funny" she laughed. "but what about Superman? He has the big 'S' on him. We can put fake muscles on his suit, like the real thing!"   
  
Dark grinned. " Why didn't I think of that?" she asked. "you're a genius, Hermione!" The two girls worked on the transfiguration spell for about half an hour. when it was complete, the four troublemakers got up and went to the great hall for breakfast.   
  
"When do you plan to commence operation 'Super Snape'?" asked Ron eagerly. Dark laughed.  
  
"Operation 'Super Snape'.......I like it" She said, dipping her toast in egg yolk. "well, I think I'll try at lunch, everyone will be there. I wonder how many students will recognize Superman......"  
  
"Beeth mee." Said Ron with a mouthfull of doughnut. Hermione hit hin on the head. "Don't talk with your mouth full!" she snapped.  
  
"Don't be my mom!" retorted Ron. The two were staring daggers at eachother. Ginny sat down and said "Will you two stop bickering like an old couple?" Ron and Hermione went pink in the cheeks after being called this and looked back to their food. Dark glanced up at the Head table. Did she just imagine it or did Professor Snape just turn away quickly? Was he watching her? Maybe he was on to her.... Nah, she had only pulled one prank.... But what if when she yelled "polo" he caught her American "accent". Great her worrying as kicking in. She glanced back at him, but he was busy eating his eggs.   
  
" Yummy...." She said without realizing, as she turned back to her own table. The others looked up at her questioningly. "What's yummy?" Ginny asked.  
  
" Eggs are yummy." Dark answered simply. Ginny looked as though she saw through this, but the boys didn't they laughed."Well, it is true," chuckled Harry, "eggs are good."   
  
The subject soon turned back to Dakota's task, and they planned what would happen.  
  
The group sat a bit closer to the staff table at lunch, but this went un-noticed, because they purposly arrived late, so the more unpopular "head seats" were the only ones open. Ther did sit a bit far back, though, so they could carry out the operation in secret. Dark tried not to look nervous, but she couldn't get rid of the nervous feeling in her teeth. Maybe some are farmilliar with this feeling. A tickly feeling in your teeth when you are nervous. Or maybe Dark and I (the author) are just weird.   
  
"Ok, I've got to wait for the right mome-" She was cut off by the doors of the great hall crashing open. It was... Professor Dumbledore?!? He was singing some weird song. Dark wasnt paying attention to him, she was aiming her transfuguration charm at Snape while the whole of the Hall's attention was on Dumbledore.   
  
The charm hit Snape head on. It worked! Dark giggled and pretended to watch Dumbledore. Snape didn't even notice. This was too easy for Dark. She just applauded with the others and it seemed she never did anything wrong. "Bless you, Professor Dumbledore!!" She thought.   
  
" Good afternoon, Severus!" Greeted Dumbledore. Attention starting to fall on Snape. " I see you are in a Super good mood today."   
  
Some of the muggleborn students laughed. Snape looked down. Man, could eyes grow that big? The face he made was too priceless! Dark heard Colin Creevey's camera snap. the whole hall burst into laughter as someone shouted " HEY SUPERMAN! GO SAVE THE DAY!!!"   
  
Snape yelped and ran out of the hall. Dark couldn't help laughing at the red undies and blue tights. She wolf whistled and all the laughter was renewed. It was the best thing to happen to Hogwarts in a long time, and Dark was ready to make this year the best ever, she was really enjoying this!  
  
After the shcool was settled, Dark got up to leave the hall. As she walked by the Headmaster, he winked at her. So he knew! Dark smiled triumphantly and left the hall. He must of heard them plotting at breakfast or someting. Dumbledore seemed to always know what was going on. Dark still couldn't believe he helped her, though. Oh well, she's have to show him the list sometime, he'd sure get a kick out of it.  
  
Dark yet again went outside. She couldn't help but enjoy basking in the sun all day like a lazy lizard. Especially after spending the summer cooped up. Her naturally tan skin was too light in her opinion. Usually in the summer she was brown. She looked at the trees by the lake and picked one out. It had thick climable branches and a big one right above the water. It wasn't too shaded. She climbed the tree and sat on the Branch overlooking the water. She had been on this tree before. Dark laughed as she remembered the time in her first year as George Weasley snuck up on her and made her fall right into the lake. She was so mad at him for a week, but after a while she didn't trip him in the hall as much.  
  
Dark yawned, the water was sparkling in tthe sun. She threw leaves in it and watched then float in small circles for a while, until they went still. There wasn't any wind to keep them moving. Dark closed her eyes and sat there in an almost sleep-like state, while pondering her next task. She was there for a few hours, and probably wouldn't complain about her lack of tan anymore. Luckily, she didn't burn.  
  
Closer to the castle you could see a figure dressed in black wandering about.  
  
Severus Snape was glad not too many people were outside. He had been completely humiliated. He wasn't quite sure who did it either. He had a few suspects, though. It could have been Potter and his dunderhead friend Weasley. He doubted it was Granger, she was too much of a goodie goodie. Perhaps Miss Smith could have had something to do with it. Yet, she had always been quiet. She didn't usually react to his snide comments. That could be it, though. She wasn't afraid of him. Snape devided not to accuse anyone for sure yet. He still liked the idea of getting Potter in trouble.  
  
He spotted something by the lake. Someone sitting in a tree. He moved in to get a closer look. It was Miss Smith, and she appeared to be sleeping. Right over the lake.   
  
"Hmm, I bet she didn't think I'd be coming outside," He thought. He snuck up to the tree. For some reason he took a moment to notice her tan. He didn't know why. Snape hid behind a bush and aimed a gust spell at her.   
  
Woosh! Right off the tree. He bit his lip, trying not to laugh. It was really the first time in a while he had someting to laugh about. Although he knew that it was kind of wrong to prank innocent students...like he cared! Though, he didn't know she wasn't innocent. If he knew what she did earlier, he probably would have turned her feet to cinderblocks before pushing her into the lake.  
  
Dark plunged into the water with a small yelp. She had a feeling that the gust of wind was not natural. She swam back to the shore. She didn't mind swimming, she liked swimming, but somebody did that on purpose. She walked up to a rock and pulled her sopping shoes and socks off.  
  
"Awww! My chucks!" She groaned. She looked quite odd driping wet with an angry scowl on her face. She began to walk, or waddle, rather towards the castle, but Snape couldn't hold in his laughter anymore.  
  
Dark heard the rich baritone laugh, and turned her head towards the bush it came from. She liked the laugh, but was in no mood to admit it. It sounded like Professor Snape, but it was a happy laugh. Dark was certain that she had never seen Snape happy. Not the twisted scare the firsties happy, but humorus sounding. Well, there was only one way to see who it was. She peered in the bushes to find Professor Snape sitting on the ground laughing hysterically... Like a kid or something.  
  
Dark Glared. "You!" she said in a murderous tone. Professor Snape simply looked up at her and laughed some more, stil sitting on the ground. That was it! Dark pounced on him, knocking him over. "ouf!" Grunted Snape, and he looked taken aback as she kinda sat on him.  
  
"Wow, his chest is hard....mmmm," Thought Dark. Then she remembered what she was doing. "What was that for?!?" Demanded Dark, as her hair dripped water on Snapes face. She did this on purpose, just to make him mad. It didn't work. He still looked like he was going to laugh as he just shrugged. Then he pushed her off him and got up.   
  
"My appologies, Miss Smith." he said, not sounding too sorry. The whole thing was funny, even to Dark, but she wouldn't admit it. They both walked closer to the shore so Dark could recover her footware. Snape held his hand out as a peace treatie, but Dark saw through that. Snape's real intentions were to throw her in the lake again, it was rather amusing. Dark pretended to take his hand shyly, but Snape noticed a change in her grip. As soon as he realized what she did to him, he was submerged in the lake. He came up and sputtered. It was Dark's turn to laugh, and she was rolling on the ground clutching her sides. " Now, we're even!" She said between laughs, which was difficult.  
  
Snape walked up to her and rung his robes out on her face. He picked her up by the scruff of the neck and gave her a nasty look.   
  
" Not so funny when the tables turn, eh Professor?" Smirked Dark after she shook her head in attempt to get the water out of her hair. He answered with his usual wit. "Maybe, but it's still funny too see you whine over your shoes." Dark wouldn't take an insult on her Chucks. She threw a wet sock at his head, and they waddled the rest of the way to the castle in silence.  
  
When they reached the Entrance Hall, they were greeted with stares. Snape's scowl fixed that, and Dark returned to the common room.  
  
Harry and Ron were playing a game of chess, while Hermione and Ginny rolled a catnip ball around for Crookshanks. They looked up at Dark with confusion as she entered the room, soaking wet.  
  
"Go swimming?" asked Ginny who was ginning at Dark.  
  
"Yeah, something like that," Answered Dark wearily. She explained what happened by the lake, and the others were pleased to hear that Dark dumped Snape in the lake as well. Dark went to her dorm and pulled on her pajama pants and a dry T-shirt. She'd go to dinner in her fuzzy bunny pants tonight, but what did she care? At six o' clock, everyone went to dinner. Dark stared at Professor Snape some, and then they started discussing the list. The next task would be done in class. Too bad the others wouldn't be there to see. Oh well, she'd have to tell them about it during break.

(I made Ron and Hermione fight a bit. I dunno, they seem to have little quarrels in ther book, like in Prisoner of Azkaban. This chapter is what I meant about Snape being out of character. I am sorry. I got really bored, and it kind of came to me...I guess.)


	5. chapter five

(Yawn, I don't feel like adding anything up here..)

Dark spent the rest of the night finishng up her homework she was assigned for the weekend. Then she went to bed. The next morning, which was Monday, she woke up early, wich was not normal for her. She decided to choose a task for today in potions class. She was a bit nervous that she'd be found out if she acted up in class, but she could try to be subtle, or at least play dumb. Besides, even if she did get in trouble, it would still, be fun. What was the worst that could happen? Adetentiopn would only give her more anooying Snape time. She searched the list carefully until she came upon a task that caught her eye. "5. Learn a charm that makes fabric turn day-glo pink. You know what to do next."

Dark had no clue what "Day-glo pink" looked like, but she knew just the people to ask about changing the color of your robes. She would just have to wait until they came downstairs. Dark sighed sleepily and sunk lower into her armchair. She would need extra coffe this morning. she hated Mondays. The door to the girl's dormitories opened and there were high pitched giggles. They were here. Lavender Brown and Parvatti Patil were Gryffindor's fasion enthusiasts, as you might call them. Dark stood up and greeted the girls. In a very business-like voice, she said,

" I am in need of your assistance. It is top secret business, and your help would be appreciated."

The two girls looked at her " Oh! Is it a boy? Or a makeover?" Lavender asked excitedly.

Dark frowned. " No, I don't need help with that. It's for... a prank. You can't tell, though. I'm trying not to get caught...yet." She said.

The two girls looked more interested. They probably wanted some inside information on this so called prank. They were also probably curious to why their help was needed. They didn't have to get near any gross boys, did they? Parvatti nodded as to ask what Dark needed. Dark asked them about the pink charm, and reluctantly told them why she needed it. After warning that there would be dire consequences if they let anything slip, they told Dark that they'd help whenever she needed them. They wanted their revenge on Snape too. A while after, Hermione came down to the common room, and Dark told her about her plan. In the middle of class, Snape would get a whole new look! Harry, Ron, and Ginny soon followed, and they all went to breakfast. Dark couldn't wait until potions class, but would have to wait a while. What a bummer. She ate her breakfast in anticipation, and after breakfast, departed from her friends.

Classes seemed to drag on forever. Charms, Transfuguration, at least she got to drop history of magic after 5th year, or she would have died today. Finally, it was time for her last class. Potions. Dark took her seat in the dungeon classroom, and waited for class to start. Right as the bell rang, Professor Sanpe stormed in, silencing the class with only his presence. The seventh year Gryffindors had class with Ravenclaw, which was a good thing for Dark. She worked well with them.The class turned to look at Professor Snape. Today he was giving some boring lecture that could put even Dark, who was very interested in potions, to sleep. After half an hour, Dark prepared to get her plan into action. Professor Snape turned to write someting on the blackboard. Dark seized her chance and muttered the spell to turn his robes pink. The spell hit him in the back, and pink spread from the point of impact. it soon covered his whole outfit. The class snickered, not wanting to be seen laughing. Snape looked at his arm, which he was writing with and noticed his sleeve was.. hot pink!

At the look of terror and confusion on his face, the whole class burst into laughter. Dark laughed too, trying not too look guilty of the crime. Professor Snape's attempts to silent the class failed and he looked furious.

"OUT! GET OUT! ALL OF YOU, NOW!" He shouted. The class didn't need to be told twice. They all ran out as quickly as they could. They laughed all through the halls until they got to the entrance hall. Everyone was asking who was the one that charmed his robes. Dark snuck away before anyone noticed her, and she went to take a walk through the school. It was a while before dinner anyways. While walking, she read the list. She liked plotting. This was going to be an interesting year. She didn't notice the Headmaster approach her.

" Ah, good afternoon, Miss, Dakota. Or are you still being called Dark?" He said, making Dark jump.

" Sorry, you scared me, Sir." She said. " Yes, im still Dark. How are you, Professor." She asked, trying to hide the list.

" And what is that?" he asked, gesturing to the parchment in Dark's hand.

" Oh, it's um, er..." She didn't know wether to show him or not, but didn't have to decide. Professor Dumbledore took the list and read it. He chuckled and gave it back to her. Dark was glad he wasn't angry.

" Severus has been needing something like that for a long time. I was suprised that the Weasley twins didn't try something like that." He laughed. His eyes twinkled. " But I had a feeling you were up to something."

" Well, Fred and George did help me write it... Professor, may I ask you someting?" Asked Dark. Dumbledore nodded. " Were you helping to distract the great hall yesterday?" Dark wanted to know this, because it was even odd for Dumbledore to burst into song.

He just smiled and said, " I don't believe I remember distracting anybody yesterday..."

Dark had a feeling he was kidding, so she said goodbye, and continued her walk. Lost in thoughts, she let her feet carry her without knowing where she was going. She didn't know that she was getting progressivly closer to the dungeons. Every once in a while she checked her watch. It was still a while until dinner. She sighed boredly, and then she heard footsteps. Coming out of her daydream, she noticed where she was. Dark was only a few corridors away from the potions classroom. Great, so the fotsteps must belong to Snape. Dark kept walking. She could take a turn at her next right and find a staircase that lead away from the dungeons. She didn't want to meet up with an angry Professor Snape, and there was no doubt that he'd be angry.

Dark was about to turn to the staircase when Snape spotted her. Dark knew he saw her when his footsteps stopped. " Oh great, here comes the interrogation!" Thought Dark.

" Miss Smith, what are you doing down here?" He asked slowly in his deep voice.

Dark turned slowly. Would he believe that she was just taking a walk. Better try him. " I was just taking a walk, Sir. I was thinking and lost track of where I was going." Well, at least she was telling the truth, but Snape probably wouldn't think so. She waited for his reply.

" Just taking walk? In the dungeons..." He didn't sound convinced. Dark was a bit frustrated by this.

" Yes, Professor, but I wasn't paying attention to where I was going." She explained, realizing how stupid she sounded only after she said it. Snape snorted slightly and then checked his watch.

" Well, I'd better ascort you to the grat hall for dinner, to make sure you aren't defacng school property." He said. Dark didn't mind this.It didn't sound so bad when the word ascort was thrown in there. Maybe he wouldn't say anything mean, and just be a silent meanie. Not true.

" You should watch what you're doing, Miss Smith. You don't want anyone to think you're getting into trouble... And especially walking alone so far away from Gryffindor territory. Very suspicious, Smith." He drawled. Was that a smirk on his face? Dark started to wonder if he was on to her and her evil scheming. She put on an innocent looking face.

" What reason is there that I would be up to something, Professor?" She asked sweetly, well, faking the sweet part. She tried the ''Bambi" eyes, but he wasn't looking at her anymore. There was no answer for this. They walked in silence until Dark got bored. She quietly conjured a wet sock and threw it at Snape's head. It made a squishy thwap-like noise and Dark giggled as Snape froze in his tracks. He looked at her. She looked back. He glared. She still looked at him. He looked funny ith a drippy sock on his head. Dark didn't expect what happened next.

Professor Snape took the sock and it looked as though he was giving it back to Dark, but then he smothered her face in socky wetness. When he stopped, Dark sputtered and wiped her face. " 'Ey! Watchit!" She said loudly. " You started it, Miss Smith, You watch it." He smirked at the suprised look on her face. When they reached the great hall, they made their ways to their own tables, Snape sat down at the head table, but didn't make it there without first being hit right in the butt by a wet sock. He almost felt a smile form on his lips, but stopped it.

" Though, it was pretty amusing to make Dakota angry..." He thought. " Wait, Dakota! Since when did I refer to my students by their first names?" He shook it off as a mere mental slip.

Dark laughed at her perfect aim and then went to sit with her freinds and tell them about what happened. She didn't mind the sock on her face, she was happy that she wasn't dead after what she did. She pulled out the list. The group were in a deep conversation about what Dark should do next. Then Harry pointed one out.

" Here's a good one!" He laughed. It was indeed good, but the others were surprized that he liked this task. it read, "11. Make a voodoo doll of Harry Potter. Push pins into it in class and smile knowingly at Snape."

" Alright," said Hermione. "We should work on making the doll after homework tonight."

Ron looked at her as if she was insane. " Homework? Is that all you think about? We gotta help Dark." He said. Everybody roled their eyes. Another fight was coming on. Hermione clenched her fists.

" What do you mean! You make it sound as though I'm not willing to help her! I'ts not like she'll die if I do my homework first! I'll help her, but i need good grades to pass." She said, glaring. Ron looked as though he was going to reply to this, but Dark spoke.

" She's right, Ron. I'd rather do my homework first anyways. It won't take long. Besides you should catch up on your work too. Im not being graded on annoying Snape anyways." She was relieved to see that Ron and Hermione had cooled off a bit. Dark went back to her mashed potatoes and steak. She was very hungry.

That night, after writing a herbology essay, which wasn't too hard, answering some potions questions, which was even easier for her, and studing animagi transformations, which was more difficult, she was ready to make her doll. Hermione wasn't ready yet, so she re-read her animagi notes.

- An animagus is a witch or wizard who can transfigure themselves into an animal at will

- It is one of the most difficult types of magic to learn

- When a person transforms into an animal, they change into their inner animal form. The inner form is usually their patronus form as well.

That was as far as she read before she was interrupted. It was Hermione and Ginny. They had lots of cloth, yarn, stuffing, and even some markers. " We're ready when you are!" Said Ginny, with a cheerfull voice. The three girls worked on the Harry doll, giggling about it's scary likeness of the real Harry. They kept it together by using seaming charms, since neither of them were good at sewing. Hermione drew on a marker face, while Dark made glasses out of a paperclip she found on the floor. After that there was only one thing missing, hair. Dark had heard that if you wanted to make a voodoo doll, you needed either hair or something that belonged to the person that the doll represented. Of course she didn't believe that voodoo dolls worked, she thought that Harry hair would make a great effect. They found Harry and Ron playing chess by the fire. Harry looked up at the girls.

"Hey, did you guys finish yet? Let me have a lo-" Harry was cut off by Dark jumping on his back. The common room was filled with sounds like, " Hold his arms down, Gins!" and " I got his legs! Hurry up Dark!" And " Oy what are you doing to Harry? HARRY are you ok!"

When the chaos was finally subdued, Dark had a few locks of Harry's hair for the doll. She used an adhering charm to put it on the doll. She carefully made it resemble Harry's messy hair style and then she showed the boys the doll. Ron laughed " It looks just like him!" He said. Dark nodded. "It's like his son or someting. Look Harry, we had a baby!" This got a laugh out of Harry, who was busy complaining about not being asked for the hair. There was no mouth on the doll. Just two line-shaped eyes and a tiny nose. It looked like a manga-like plushie. It was kinda cute. She even made little sneakers for it. Dark really hoped that Snape wouldn't confiscate it. It could make a funny Christmas present to Harry. Plushies were fun presents. Last Christmas Sirius got her a plushie horse, because whenever anyone asked her what she wanted for a gift, she said " I wanna pony!" Of course, she cracked and told everyone what she wanted after a while... exept for Sirius. She sure missed messing with his head.

Dark sighed and put the voodoo doll in her book bag. She had potions first tomoorow. Then she realized that tomorrow was Halloween. How could she have forgotten! Time was passinf so quickly and she had hardly made a dent in her list. She'd have to work harder. She bid her friends a good night and went to her dorm. She dug around in her trunk and pulled out a plush horse and hugged it. It was soft and cuddly. She took it to bed and fell asleep with it cuddled up under her chin.

Dark opened her eyes. She was sitting on the back of a big horse doll. " Whee fun!" She said. She looked around. Where was she? Her surroundings changed from outdoors to the dark school corridors. Was it night? The horse stopped and Dark got off. She pet it. It squeaked like a dog chew toy. She was in the dungeons and was heading towards the potions class. The door was ajar, so she walked faster. She looked inside and gasped. Professor Snape was being attacked by... what was it? The room was only lit by a few candles. For a second, Dark grinned as she recalled some dreams that took place in this surrounding. She heard Professor Snape yelp, so she ran into the room. Whatever was attacking him sure smelled bad. "Professor!" Dark yelled as she lunged at his attackor. It was squishy. She punched it, and took out a big sword from nowhere. Dark hacked away at it, and it fell by a cluster of candles. It looked like a...big sock...? It was! She had just slain a big wet sock the size of a grown man. " Weird," She thought. Dark's attention turned towards Professor Snape, who was sitting on the floor and rubbing his head. Dark knealt by him.

" Are you alright?" She asked.

" Yeah, I think I am." He said, nodding at her.

Dark was wondering why Snape couldn't take down a smelly sock. She asked him. He looked a bit insulted, and said, " It caught me off guard. Who would expect a sock would want their blood?"

Dark noticed a smashed vial on the floor. Snape followed her gaze. The damned thing broke it while I was putting it away. That was when it attacked." Dark looked back up at him.

"Oh, you're bleeding." She said, pulling a hankercheif out of her pocket. Since when did she carry those around? Oh well. She made to wipe the spot on his forehead, where the cut was, when Professor Snape caught her arm. He pulled her towars him and hugged her.

" Thank you," He said, " for helping me." He looked into her eyes, and she looked into his. Snape placed his mouth by Dark's neck.

" Dark... RRRIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGG!"

Dark's eyes snapped open. The bells on her brass alarm clock were blaring. " GAH!" She said, thickly. She was too tired to figure out how to stop the noise. She picked up the screeching hell clock and threw it against the wall. That worked. " Damn you, demon clock!" She shouted. Ok, to many comics for her. She didn't want to wake up. Such a good dream too. She grudgingly got out of bed and put on her school clothes. She went into the bathroom and brushed her teeth and hair. Once satisfiyed with her appearance, she went downstairs to the common room.

She went into the corner, where she left her shoes and book bag. When she was ready, she left Gryffindor tower, and went to breakfast. Mmmm, the great hall smelled like pancakes. Dark sat down and helped herself to food. Her friends were there, and they greeted her. Dark glanced up at the head table. When she saw Snape, she remembered her dream. Damn clock. She turned back to her breakfast just as the mail came. Her owl, Huntress swooped down at her place. She had a letter from her parents clutched in her feet. Things seemed fine at home. Her little brothers almost killed her pet niffler, but besides that, everythihng was fine. " Oh goody!" Said Dark. Her parents sent her some Halloween candy. She took the box of chocolate frogs and put them in her book bag.

Dark turned back to her friends. " I realized something," she said. " I have got tto get my ass moving on those tasks. It's halloween allready, and i've inly got a few of them done. I don't plan to complete the whole list, but i've got to do a lot of the tasks." She sounded a bit urgent. This was her last year as a student here. Hogwarts had been home to most of the best times of her life. She had to make her own impression here before it was too late.

The others agreed, and were willing to help as much as they could. They all wanted to see more Snape abuse as well.

When breakfast was through, Dark took her bag and headed towards the dungeons. She had a lot of time to get there, because of the small break after breakfast, so she walked slow. She then realized that she had no pins to stick into the doll. She quickly dug a few hair pins out of her bag, and transfigured them into sewing pins, like the kind you put iinto pin cushions. Then, she hurried off to class. Finding those pins took a while. Dark got to the potions class, and sat down. When Snape came in and shut the door, the class fell silent. He assigned the work for the day, and with a wave of his wand, the directions were on the board.

Dark got to work on the potion straight away. Heh, kid stuff. By the time the class was half up, her potion was finished. She bottled some and put it on Professor Snape's desk. When she got back to her seat, she reached into her book bag, and took out the Harry plushie, or voodoo doll, whatever. She began playing with the pins...as in pushing them into the doll. Dark was having fun with it, exept for the fact that it looked like her friend. Every so often, she looked at Snape through the corner of her eye. When he finally noticed what she was doing, he stared at her with a look of confusion. Dark looked up and caught his eye. She smiled knowingly, and winked as she put another pin through "Harry's" head.

"Crazy girl," Severus thought. "Is she trying to bug me? Or trying to kill Potter? Or what?" Snape walked up to Dark, who had stopped looking at him. By now some of the other students were watching too, trying to stifle their giggles.

" Miss Smith." He began slowly. " Please refrain from attempting to cause harm to your fellow students." He was trying to keep his calm. The girl was distracting HIS class. The pest.

Dark slowly looked up at him. She had been pretending to be too interested in the doll to listen.

"Huh?" she said, looking as if she was oblivious to what he had said. Dark knew she struck a nerve.

" I said, stop that. Now!" Snape snarled. Dark was expecting him to onfiscate the doll. "You can do that on your own time." He added. The class laughed. Snape probably just wanted to see if Harry would be affected by this...without himself holding the blame.

The bell rang, and the class filed out. Dark spent the whole day getting " Nice one, Dark!" s and things like that from the other students. At lunch, Dark told everyone what happened. The rest of the day was quite uneventful, well besides the Halloween dinner. There was lots of candy. We'll leave it at this: Dark Candy WHEEEEEEE!

( Now I want a Harry Doll. I allready made a Snape one. It looks very poorly made... I used hot glue to keep it together... mmyep. Oh, and can anyone tell me, What is day-glo pink? Is it like hot pink? Or what? ) 


	6. chapter six

( Thanks for the reviews.)

The next morning, Dark got ready and headed to the common room. Basically, it was a normal morning. Noting special, so why did I write about it? Well, my friend, what would happen if a character never woke up in the morning? the book would be all like zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.......mumble drool BORING! See? ok, I'm sorry about that.I an ashamed. here we go.  
  
She had a few extra minutes before she had to go to breakfast, so she looked over the list. She saw a task that seemed appropriate after yesterday's voodoo funness. it read...  
  
"83. Make a habit out of grabbing Harry Potter and dragging him into Snape's office by his ears, crying 'Here he is, Sir! I've got him!'"  
  
" You can't be serious!!!" Cried Harry, who was reading over Dark's shoulder. Dark jumped.   
  
" DON'T Sneak up on me!!!" She yelled. Harry quickly apologized. By then, Ron and Hermione were in the common room too. They all convinced Harry to play along with the trick, and went to breakfast. Harry was scowling.   
  
Severus Snape made his way to the Great Hall lost in thought. Was Miss Smith the one who turned his robes pink, and howled, and put him in that riduculus costume thing? He was getting suspicious, but maybe it wasn't. One could never be sure without proof. He was very glad that he didn'thave the seventh year Gryffindor class today. He would have to look into all of this later. Before he knew it, he was in the great hall, and was taking his seat.   
  
Snape kept sneaking glances at Dark. He was wondering if she was up to something. After a while, Dark must have sensed she was being watched, so she looked up. She met Snapes eyes and stared back for a while with an odd look on her face. After a few moments she blushed and looked away.   
  
" Blushing? Why? That's very......odd of her. Hmmm" Severus thought. Didn't blushing usually mean? .....Naw. Snape shook the thought away.  
  
Dark looked away from Snape. She felt her cheeks burning, and her stomach did a flip. " Uh, what? Why?" She thought. Her thoughts were soon broken.  
  
"Dark? You ok?" It was Ginny. "You're blushing...." Ginny was looking at her curiously.  
  
" I am? heh, weird. I uh hadn't noticed.." funny nervous laughter concluded this panicked speech. Not only did Dark's friends catch this odd behavior, but so did Snape, who was watching her still. Was it him What did he do?  
  
Dark turned back to her food, and regained ('s that a word?) her compusure. She decided not to start her task until after lessons were through. There was a good amount of time before dinner. After classes, Dark and Harry checked the map to see if Snpe was in his office. He was. Harry looked anxious, so Dark had to assure him that if Snape was going to kill anyone after this, it would be her. When the two were close to Snape's office, Dark grabbed Harry by the ear and approached the door.   
  
" I GOT 'EM SIR!!! RIGHT HERE!!! I GOT 'EM!!!!!" She yelled at Snape's door. He opened it to find Dark holding a struggling Harry by the ear.   
  
" Wha- What is the meaning of this?!?" Snape demanded. He looked confused and sightly agitated.  
  
" I got 'im....Sir." Dark said. Then she shoved Harry into Snape's office, luckily Snape got pushed in too. " DARK!!!" Harry yelled angrily. He ran at her, and so did Snape. Luckily, Dark got a head start. She was running towards the room of requirement. Halfway thgere, she heard Harry stop and give up, but Snape was more determined. Nearing the room, Dark thought " OK safe place! Need safe place." She bolted into the room, and locked the door. Footsteps were coming closer. Ther were Snape's. Dark looked around. She found the safe place that the room supplied her. A pillow fort? Oh great. Sure that made her feel safe during a thunderstorm when she was little. What help was it now???  
  
Bam! Snape was pounding on the door. Dark darted into the pillow fort. " There, thunder...." She thought. The fort was comfy inside. Dark hid under a blanket as she heard Professor Snape say "Alohomora" Sadly for Dark, the charm worked. The door slamed open.  
  
" Miss Smith!!!" Snape yelled. He noticed the pillow fort and looked at it. "Some defense..." He thought. He peered inside and found a lump under a mass of blankets. "Miss Smith.." He said, prodding the lump. It squirmed. Snape crawled inside the fort and prodded the lump again. "Just come out! I know you're there!" He was getting impatient. Suddenly, a blanket was thrown over his head. He yelped and struggled to escape the heavy quilt. He stopped to breathe, and heard muffled laughter. "Stupid lump...I mean girl" he thought. He attempted to get out of his blankety prison, and fell over.   
  
"AAIEE" Dark Squeaked. She poked her head out of her blankets and was face to face with Snape. How akward... Dark kind of hoped he'd get off soon. She felt her cheeks burning again.  
  
" Uh..... guh gurgle......meep" Dark uh, I guess you can say said. She couldn't quite get the words out. Her cheeks were probably blood red by now. She squirmed out of the blanket qickly, and gasped for fresh air. Snape poked his head out too. Was that girl blushing again?   
  
Dark scrambled to her feet and made a move towards the door. She was almost there, when Professor Snape spoke.  
  
" Miss Smith. Don't think you'll get off withoout losing some points for shoving Mr. Potter into me, and for disturbing the peace. Ten points from Gryffindor."  
  
Dark felt a bit angry. Disturbing the peace? He made that up, didn't he? At least he only took ten points. Gryffindor was im the lead, anyways, it wouldn't hurt. She turned around and headed towards the Great hall. It was almost time for dinner. When she got there, Harry still looked a bit pissed, but he didn't say anything about it. Dark told the others about what had happened after she left Harry. She glanced up at Snape, who was eating, so he didn't notice her. That was a relief. She didn't want to be seen blushing again.  
  
Dark reached into her bag and pulled out the list. She didn't know which task to do next, so she started to hand it to Harry, but decided not to, since he was probably wanting revenge. Instead, she handed it to Hermione. Hermione looked over the list.  
  
" Pick one allready, 'Mione!" said Dark. Laughing, Hermione pointed to the first one on the list. It read, "1. Learn a charm that gives it's unsuspecting victim a large, fluffy, white rabbit's tail. For a week. Put it to good use." Dark almost choked on her dinner, she laughed so hard. Realizing how unattractive she was probably looking while doing tis, she swallowed her food, going a bit red. Fred and George must have known a spell that did this, because they were the ones who added it to the list. She's have to floo them and ask. She decided to wait 'till later, so that nobody would know it was her. Dark looked up and noticed Snape was watching them. She informed the others of this, and started laughing loudly so that Snape could hear her.   
  
" I can't believe them!" She said, still laughing.   
  
" What? I didn't see the letter yet. Who did what??" Asked Harry. They were pretending that the list was a letter. Dark turned to Harry.  
  
" My little brothers! My mom caught them eating a bunch of knuts to see if they'd poo out a sickle!" Dark's fake laugh, thank merlin., was pretty convincing. And the lie was so stupid that the others laughed. Even some of the other Gryffindors heard this, and were laughing as well. It wasn't too suprising, because Dark's little brothers were always doing someting stupid. Snape obviously bought it, becase he wasn't paying attention anymore. Dark put the list away, and finished her dinner. She had a lot of homework to do.  
  
Once Dark was finished with her evil homework, it was pretty late, and the common room was almost empty. Only Hermione was there, and she was half asleep. Dark stood up and went to her dorm to get some floo powder. When she returned to the common room, Hermone came out of her zombie like state. The two girls knealt by the fire, and Dark threw in a pinch of the floo powder.  
  
" Weasley Wizard Wheezes!" She half shouted. She hoped they'd be there. She was pretty sure they moved into the room above the shop. Dark poked her head into the fire. Luckily George was there. He looked up and grinned.  
  
" Dakota, how absolutely spiffing to see you!" He joked. Dark was farmilliar with this game.  
  
" George dear! I just fancied a chat." she said in a fake brittish accent. Dark looked a bit more serious now, and she got to her business. " Do you know of a spell that gives someone a bunny tail?" She asked. George grinned again.  
  
"Ah, so you're still at that list?" He asked. " Yeah I know the spell. Lemme write it down for you." He wrote it down and handed it through the fire. With those uh, fire tong things. " Here Dark, good luck!" He bid he farewell, and with a small pop, Dark pulled her head out of the fire.  
  
"Got it?" asked Hermione. Dark showed her the parchment with the spell on it.  
  
" I'll get him in the morning. Think Harry'll let me borrow his cloak?" Hermione nodded. Dark didn't really have to ask, she knew Harry would want to see Snape with a bunny tail. Dark yawned and said goodnight to 'Mione. Then she went to bed. She would need to rest up for tomorrow morning.


	7. chapter seven

( Gasp! Snape is going to strike back soon. Dark will be found out! I will admit to being a loser!)

Severus Snape sat in his living quarters with a slight scowl on his face. He had a blue piece of torn cloth in his hand. It has a big red S on it. He had done some research on this symbol. That is, from the suit some student punk had put him into. He leardned that it was the symbol for Superman. Superman, he found was a "super hero" from a comic book...An American comic book! He had his culprit!  
  
Snape's face suddenly split into a sinister grin. If you saw anyone with a look like this on their face, you'd be running as fast as you could! He'd get her for this. This would probably turn out to be an all out war of wits... or something catchy sounding like that. The thing was, he didn't know what drove Miss Smith to do such things. He'd been pretty fair to her, hadn't he? He certainly didn't treat her like Potter. another thing that puzzled Snape was that he didn't feel like he hated the girl. He should after what she did, but no. He felt like this was some sort of competition against her. Of course thst didn't mean he wouldn't get his revenge. He would! And he'd laugh, oh how he'd laugh!....I'm sounding insane now. No more of this paragraph!!  
  
" I'll have to think of a good prank to pull on her. It has to let her know this is war.....But I can't do anyting to her pretty face.....WHAT???" Snape was thinking this, but the the sudden exclamation was spoken, rather, shouted out loud. That was an odd thought to think. Snape was slightly afraid of that thought. He dismissed it for now, and went on to plotting. He decided to give Dark a warning shot before he made his big move. In fact, he was going to fire that warning shot right now. Snape stalked off.  
  
Dark woke up the next morning and looked at the bed curtains at the end of her bed. She rubbed her eyes in disbelief. Someting was hanging from them. It looked like a torn piece of a...Superman suit! It was. Nobody could mistake the big S logo.  
  
" Oh crap, he's on to me!" Dark said quietly. Then she thought of someting. How did Snape get that thing in here?.... Would that mean he came here? Dark got a strange feeling in her stomach when she considered this. She pulled the cloth off of her curtains and an idea struck her. She grinned evily... Another look that would send someone running.. well not running, but it would get a lot of suspicious looks, anyways.  
  
Dark went through her morning routine, and made her way to the common room. She talked to Harry about his invisibility cloak, and he agreed to let her borrow it. Dark took the cloak, and went to the great hall alone. It was pretty empty, and Snape wasn't there yet. Dark discreetly put on the cloak, and waited for him. When he arrived, Dark whispered the incantation, and the spell hit him. Just then, a big crowd of students came into the hall. Dark sat at the Gryffindor table and watched Snape out of the corner of her eye. Her friends sat down and did the same.   
  
Just then, Snape's eyes went wide and he shifted in his seat. It was obvious that he was trying to discreetly feel his backside.   
  
" Heh, look, Snape's feeling himself," Dark whispered to the others, trying not to laugh at what she said. That was probably the best pun she would ever make. Although she didn't balme Snape. He had just sprouted a bunny tail.  
  
He got up and tried to leave, but Dumbledore saw the fluffy tail. He said something to Snape and laughed. Professor Snape went very red, either in anger or embarassment. Dark was so happy to see that Dumbledore had called attention onto Snape by just takilng to him. That old guy was the best!   
  
Laughter started softly, and soon reached a roar. By then, Snape was gone though. Too bad he was allreadt on to Dark. She was starting to wonder if she should have done that. Oh well, she had something else coming for him in class today!  
  
Dark remembered the cloth and showed the others. They were a bit shocked to hear that Snape was on to Dark, but Dark wasn't very bothered by it. She just wanted to know how it got in her room.   
  
Dark left the Great hall and went to transfiguration class. They were still studing animaguses and were learning how to find their inner animal form. It all sounded more complicated that Dark thought it would be. She used to watch Sirius transform all the time. It looked simple. Although, Dark always wondered how he did it. After a few more classes, Dark was heading down to the potions classroom. She couldn't wait to see Professor Snape's tail. The thought of it made Dark laugh and skip all the way down the hall. When she got there, the class was filing in to the room. Some of them asked if she had anythig in store for them today. She only smiled and said " You'll see!"   
  
She took the blue fabric out of her pocket and walked into the room with the rest of the straglers. Snape looked up and noticed the blue cloth in Dark's hand. Dark thought there was a somewhat fearful look in his eyes, but she couldn't tell, because it had gone away just like that. Dark took a deep breath, heald out the cloth, and said in an airy, fake sounding voice,   
  
" Oh, Professor Snape, I think this is yours. You left it in my room, you know!. fake flirty laugh I thought you might like it back, hmm?" Dark was quite impressed with her acting skills. Snape was burning bright red, and the class was howling with laughter, and cheering.  
  
All Professor Snape could do was gape at her and silently curse himself for planting that damn cloth. He should have seen someting like tis coming! One of his death glares silenced the room at onnce, and the class started. They were working on a slightly complex potion. "Child's play," Thought Dark, who actually liked brewing potions. She'd probably work with potions in some way for a career. She didn't like thinking too far ahead, but it wasn't very far, actually. This made Dark worry whenever she thought about it.   
  
Dark bottled her potion, and brought it up to Snape's desk. Her's was the first one done, again. Snape looked up at her.  
  
" Ten points from Gryffindor, for your earlier display." He said in a low growly voice. Dark shivered at the sound of it, and quickly went back to her seat. While waiting for the others to finish their potions, Dark kept looking up at Professor Snape's tail. She wasn't the only one either. She noticed that everybody was trying not to snigger at the poor Professor. Dark liked the tail, it was all cute and fuzzy. She kind of wanted one herself. The thought made her giggle a bit. She tried not to, but she noticed that Snape was now giving her a death glare. Whoops.  
  
Once the bell rang, all of the students gathered their things, and filed out of the room. Dark, however was told to stay. Snape did not look happy at all. Dark was a bit nervous, but didn't show it. She wouldn't let him scare her. She kept her face calm.  
  
"Miss Smith.."  
  
"Yes, Profesor?"  
  
" Would you like to explain what you found so humorus during class?"  
  
" Oh, well I was just wonderng where you got that tail. I wouldn't mind one."  
  
" This is NOT amusing Miss Smith. I believe you know where this... thing came from!"  
  
" Nope... It's kinda cute... all fuzzy -like."  
  
" Ten points from Gryffindor!"  
  
" Hey! That was a compliment."  
  
" Well I didn't- HEY! Get away from my tail! No you can't touch it!!!"  
  
" You need some ears."  
  
" Just go away."  
  
The conversation was heard by the Gryffindor seventh years that were all listening by the door. When Dark left the classroom, she was carried off by the class as if she just won the quiddich cup. Once out of the dungeons, they set her down, and began laughing. Dark blushed and took a bow. Then hurried off to herbology class.   
  
At lunch, Dark told her friends what happened. They had allready heard most of the story, though. Rumors spread like disease at Hogwarts. Dark decided to give Professor Snape a break until his tail went away. Although, she did sneak a carrot onto his desk right after lunch. Ah yes, it was a good day...

( Well, Snape is on to Dark, but she recovers the warning blow. Oh, that joke that Dark made, what did you think? Review, please.)


	8. chapter eight

( Snape strikes back!....again! Erm, part of this chapter disturbes me. I don't know why I wrote it.... you'll see....)

For the past week, Dark had taken it easy on Snape. This didn't stop the death glares he sent her almost daily. Dark sighed. It was a Saturday morning, and it was only eight in the morning. Usually, she'd be asleep for at least two more hours, but she couldn't. she kept thinking about.... Snape! She had been woken up at around five by one or two of her roommates sneaking back from being who know where with thier boyfriends. This slightly irritated Dark. Not the sneaking out thing, but the fact that those stupid girls couldn't sneak to save their lives. Then they giggled and talked about their fun time at the friggin astronomy tower for half an hour. Then they noticed Dark was awake and asked her why she never spoke to them.   
  
Dark groaned. She fell asleep from around five- thirty to seven. Then she couldn't keep her mind off Snape. She wished that he would at least stop looking like he hated her... he probably did hate her, though. Another sigh. Dark plopped her face back on the pillow. How frustrating! She was making the person she had a crush on hate her! But how incredibly weird and wrong sounding her crush was. If she told anyone, she would get either a weird look or a gag in return. Yet, she couldn't crush this......uh crush. Well, she couldn't just lay and do nothing. If she couldn't sleep, then she'd get up!  
  
As soon as she had got up out of bed, she knew she shouldn't have gotten up today. She was instantly drenched in freezing ice water! She let out a scream of suprise. Shivering with cold and anger, she looked up. A floating bucket.... Dark got the message instantly.  
  
Severus Snape woke up in a cheerful mood for once. He looked at his clock. Eight o' four. It seemed a bit early for the girl to wake up. Perhaps he'd listen and see if he could hear her yell from here. Severus laughed. Ice water. A nice wakeup call. But he remembered something that troubled him. While setting up his trap he had ..... watched her sleep. Just for a minute, but he couldn't help it. She didn't seem so annoying when she was sleeping. Oh well, he wished he could see her face when she got up ths morning. Snape laughed. He didn't expect Dark to have allready gotten up. He also didn't expect what she was plotting for him next.  
  
"DAMN HIM!" Dark said angrily. Soaking wet and fuming with anger. She was not a morning person and this didn't help.  
  
" Damn who?" Asked one of Dark's roommates, sticking her head out of her bed hangings. When seeing Darks condtion she said. " What happened to you? Are you saying that a him was in here? WHO???"   
  
Dark thought that this girl ( She forgot her name) was a bit too excited at the fact that a guy was in the dorm. Ignoring the girl, Dark got up and got dressed. That was two really crappy pranks Snape pulled.. Well one and a warning. It was her turn. She laughed evily as she did her hair in a kind of short messy (as the muggles called it: Blow dried) look.  
  
One dry and ready, Dark climbed down the staircase leading to the common room. There was barely anybody there. Dark figured they went to breakfast. Since she wasn't hungry, Dark went to the library. Better to get that homework out of the way then to wait until the last minute...like usual.  
  
There was only a few younger students in the library. This left the table by the window open. Dark smiled. It was her favorite seat. She sat down and took out her books. She worked on some of her charms and transfiguratioons essays and saved the rest for later. It was Saturday, so who wants to do a lot of work. Dark then took out her potions book. She had to do a one foot essay. She quickly breezed through that assignment. Potions was like a puzzle. Once you knew the properties of the ingredients, it was easy. Certain things affect the pH of the potions, somethings react with others.. It seemed a bit complicated at first, but when you got it, it's cool to see how logic it all is. In around forty five minutes, her essay was done. Wow Dark wasn't used to sitting still that long... outside of classes, that is.  
  
As she put her books away, she heard a small voice adress her.  
  
" Um, Dark, is it?" Asked the voice.  
  
Dark looked up. It was a small Gryffindor boy. A first year. Curious as to what he wanted Dark smiled " Yup that's me. What do ya need?" She asked in a nice voice. The poor boy looked a bit nervous.  
  
" I was wondering," he began, " if you could help me with my potions essay..... I heard you were really good at potions." He looked at his feet.   
  
Dark glanced at the clock. it was ten. Was Snape being hard on the firsties? Sure she could help little... whatshisname.   
  
" Sure what do you got?" The boy showed Dark his assignment. " Gah, Ol' Snapey's bein' tough on you guys. But it's simple if you look at it really.. What's your name anyways, kid?"  
  
" Oh, I'm sorry. My name is Jonny." He said.   
  
" Ok, Nny. Lemme show you how this works."  
  
"Nny?" Jonny looked a bit confused.  
  
" Sorry, too many muggle comics. Ok, so you see, powdered asphodel roots and wormwood..."  
  
Dark helped Jonny on his work for a while. She explained how the properties of the ingredients affected the reaction of the potion. There was a bunch of simple rhymes she made up. It was fun playing tutor. Dark just hoped that it wouldn't cause an evil flock of firsties. Nny, as Dark called him ( She read Jonny the Homicidal Maniac.) told her about how Snape liked to pick on him the most. Dark told him about how she was the one who has been pranking Snape. It wasn't much of a secret anymore, so she didn't mind telling him. She promised to dedicate her next prank to Nny, and she let him pick it. Dark laughed when he pointed one out. It was a good one. It was one that she wrote.  
  
"34. Leave a well-worn and sickeningly cute teddy-bear where it can be seen easily by staff and students. Ensure it has a tag, written in a child's hand, stating that he "belongs to Severus" and is called "Chuckles"."  
  
Dark grinned and left the library. Snape may have gotten her this time, but he would pay so dearly tomorrow morning. She laughed in the corridors while walking to the Gryffindor tower. And just for a fun little plot pickup, guess who she ran into.  
  
Professor Snape, who was walking in the opposite direction stopped and looked at Dark, who was laughing like she was in the crazy house. Dark stopped laughing, and stopped walking.Hey why not check another one off the list? Dark ran up to Snape and gave him a big hug. Snape was a bit shocked, but recovered and pulled her arms off of him.   
  
" What was that?!?!?!" He nearly shouted.   
  
Dark, who was thinking about the task, replied. " Strict orders from Professor Dumbledore, sir!"  
  
Professor Snape just glared at her. Dark gave him a salute, and skipped merrily down the hall. Heh, she was using that task as an excuse to hug him. Oh well. She had a teddy bear to make.  
  
Once she got back to the common room, she saw Hermione, Harry, and Ron. They were all discussing something, and looked up when Dark entered. Secret keepers, eh? Dark smiled.  
  
" Go on, I'm going upstairs anyways." She didn't really care what they were discussing. She was about to leave when Harry cleared his throat.   
  
" Oh, you are not going anywhere. We were just discussing you." Dark was a bit nervous. Did they know her secret?? She turned and faced them slowly. Harry spoke again. " You have been slacking on the prank pulling. Are you alright? Is something wrong?"  
  
Dark felt relieved. She assured them that she was only waiting for the tail to come off, which it did. Then she told them about her nice wake up shower. Ther looked a bit shocked. Dark laughed. She told them about the next prank she was working on. Ron volunteered to help out, since he hadn't contributed much. He gave Dark an old sweater that she could transfigure. She wrapped the sweater in a ball, so it had a bit less shape to it. It would be easier to transfigure. After a few tries and cursewords, Dark got a bear shape. She worked on making it disgustingly, sickeningly, cute. She even made it look a little bit flat around the middle, as if it had been hugged a lot. Ron set to work with a crayon and made the tag. Dark made fun of him and how hard his task was. Once the bear, I mean monster was completed, Dark held it up for the others to see the finished work. There was a collection of "awws" around the common room. Dark hugged the critter. It was so disgustingly adorable that she couldn't help it. Nobody could.   
  
Once the bear had made it back from it's hugfest around the common room, Dark put it safetly in her school trunk. She would get up extra early tomorrow to set it up right in the entrance hall. Chuckles was going to be the subject of the day for the students, and maybe staff for a day or two.  
  
Dark was woken up at three in the morning the next day. It wasn't because of her task. It was because there was somebody outside of her bed curtains. She opened them a bit. Snape was setting up another bucket. Couldn't he pull a good joke? Dark silently crawled to the other side of her bed with her wand out. She poked her head out of her bed, and with a wave of her wand, the bucked had dumped itself on Professor Snape. Oh, it was a good joke. It looked like pudding or something, not water. Snape looked around, and then Dark appeared next to him.   
  
" Some jokes get old pretty quick, Sir." She said, trying not to sound as annoyed as she was. it was THREE in the morning! Snape snorted at the sight of her pumpkin print pajama pants.   
  
" I figured that you wouldn't expect the same joke twice in a row. He said quietly.   
  
Dark sniffed. " You smell like chocolate pudding...." A glare was sent back. " You know, that stuff is for eating, not bathing." A growl. Dark reached up an took a bit of pudding off his shoulder. She ate it. Snape looked a bit weirded out. He started to turn around to leave, but Dark was in a piss Snape off mood. " Hey, stay still!" she said in a sharp whisper, trying not to wake her annoying roommates. He turned around and gave her another death glare.   
  
Dark conjured a spoon. At the sight of this, Snape made an exit, but was followed by Dark.   
  
"Pudding! Wait! I want pudding!" She called after him, trying not to laugh. She chased him down a few flors, and was starting to get tired.She must have looked pretty funny. Barefooted and wearing a T-shirt and pumpkin pants, while waving a spoon around and running. Well, at least she got Snape back for sneaking around her room. It was a bit creepy, yet it wasn't too bothersome, well the attempt to trick her was.  
  
She finaly caught up with Ol' Snapey, and she pushed him down trying not to cause pain. Snape let out a "WAH" and fell. Dark sat next to him and spooned pudding off him. She didn't really eat it, though. That would have been pretty gross. Instead she played hair stylist with pudding gel. That was fun until Snape got over the shock of being knocked over. Snape got up and looked pretty mad.  
  
" What was that about?!" Ha demanded. Heh, he had nothing to complain about  
  
" What was sneaking into my dorm and attempting to set up a pudding trap about?" Dark asked in a calmer manner. She could barely keep a straight face, because Snape's hair was sticking up in all directions. While Snape was trying not to explode, Dark yawned and looked at her pudding covered hands. She could imagine her little brothers saying someting stupid, like poopy hands. Yuck. It did kind of look like... poo hands. She casually wiped them off on Professor Snape and walked away. She really needed a bit more sleep, and a chance to set up Chuckles the bear.   
  
She didn't even get stopped by Snape. Maybe he figured he started the whole mess. Most likely he thought he really needed a bath. He was covered in pudding, and his hair was styled into some sort of mowhawk.  
  
Dark went to her room and got the bear. Once she set it up, she headed back to bed. It was only like three thirty. She slept for four hours, and was woken up by Hermione.   
  
" Hurry up, you'll miss it! Snape goes to breakfast in like fifteen minutes!" She said excitedly.  
  
This woke Dark up. She got ready quickly and ran to the entrance hall. A few people were looking at the bear allready. Soon a whole crowd gathered around it. They were all laughing. Soon, Snape noticed the crowd, and he went to see what it was all about. Dark hid behind some tall people. She still got to see Snape's face when he read the tag, though. It was absolutely priceless. He knew that it was Dark who did this, and after being laughed at for a while, he scanned the crowd for signs of the culprit. Dark was pretty safe though, because the was on the short side. At least, she though she was safe. She was about to turn around to go to the great hall, when she felt a tight grip on her wrist.  
  
" You!" came a farmiliar growling voice. Snape looked pretty pissed.  
  
" Me......what?" Dark asked. She tried not to sound nervous, but she was. Snape looked murderous.

(See where I was bothered in this chapter. I mean, nothing BAD, but still, I just ruined pudding for me...)


	9. chapter nine

( That white slab in the can of beans.... That's the Queen Bean!)

By the time the two got to Snape's office, Dark's wrist was getting pretty sore. Snape must have been pushed a bit far by the cuteness of Chuckles. Professor Snape opened the door and they walked in.  
  
"Sit." He said in his usual angry voice. Dark sat and waited for him to start. Once he started ranting about her conduct, she would probably tune him out somehow.  
  
"Miss Smith. You have been making a fool out of me for the past few months. Today...."  
  
Dark kept a blank face throughout Snape's rant. Her thoughts flipped through random things as she pretended to listen.  
  
" Violating curfew..."  
  
HEHE silly penguns.....Did snape say perfume? Nah, probably cerfew. He's kinda cute when he's angry...In a scaryish way. I wonder when he'll shut his mouth.... He sure looks mad.   
  
" Using magic on me, your Professor!"   
  
Well, he's sure used his magic on me.... Wah! Stop it! Yucky Dark!  
  
" Smith! Are you listening to ANYTHING I'm saying??" Snape must have realized that Dark was ignorong his speech.  
  
" Wha? Oh. Yes sir, I understand...." Dark said automatically. She snapped out of her trance and noticed that Snape's eye was twitching. Whoops.   
  
" Detention. Tonight at eight. Be here Miss Smith." Snape said in a harsh tone. He pointed to the door, and it was quite clear to Dark that she should leave.  
  
While walking back up to the great hall, Dark started to laugh. She didn't find anything funny, but she was tired. She thought of last night and laughed even harder. When she got to the Gryffindor table, Harry and Ron looked terrified. Hermione looked a bit worried, but probably more for the insane boys.  
  
" What did he do to you? Did he make you insane? Why are you laughing!?!?" Blurted Ron. He still thought that Snape was the spawn of evil. Dark stopped laughing. She didn't understand why they were that afraid of Snape. She explained what happened, so Ron and Harry wouldn't pee themselves. Then she pulled out her list.  
  
" You are still going to do that?" Asked Harry. " Snape's allready caught you and gave you detention!"  
  
" Don't be stupid. I'm not going to let him scare me. Besides I think it's war now." Answered Dark. She'd find someting to do during her detention. She scanned the oh-so-farmilliar list and found one to do.  
  
"108. Look at him. Give him over- exaggerated expressions. Change you expression every 5 seconds. excited, scared, thoughtful, angry, sad, demure, happy, etc"  
  
Dark thought about this task and smiled broadly. Hermione leaned over to see what was so funny, so Dark pointed to the task. Hermione laughed.   
  
" Can't you imagine it?" Asked Dark. Then she started making weird faces. The whole Gryffindor table laughed, even though they had no clue what she was doing.   
  
Since it was Sunday, Dark didn't have to do anything. She sat around inside, because she didn't want to go out into the cold November air. She took a long nap to make up for waking up so early to take a run around the castle. When she woke up, it was three in the afternoon. Lunch was over, so she took a trip to the kitchen. The house elves happily got her some taquitos. She felt like eating taquitos for some strange reason. When she was done eating, she went to sleep again. She was probably going to be up all night because of it, but she juat really wanted to sleep.   
  
She woke up to the sound of Ginny's voice.   
  
"Dark! It's almost eight! Get up, lazy!" Ginny was grinning. " Wouldn't want to miss your detention with Snapey-poo!" She was too clever.  
  
Dark groaned. " Aw, whaddaya mean?" She asked sheepishly. Ginny gave her a look. "Ok, Gins, you got me. But how can I help it?" Dark climbed out of the portriat hole, said hello to the fat lady, and set off to Snape's office. She sighed, not looking forward to acting insane in front of Snape. The task seemed fun until she really thought about it. Oh well, the show must go on, right?  
  
Dark knocked on the door to Snapes office.  
  
"Enter." Came his voice from inside. Dark went into the room and awaited instruction for her detention.   
  
Snape gave her a stack of first year potions essays to correct, and pointed to a desk in the corner of the room. Cold shoulder, eh? Dark got to work on the essays. When she finished grading the first one, She looked up. Snape was watching her. Dark put on the happiest looking face she could without hurting her face. Snape shook his head and looked back to his work. Dark corrected a few more esays. She put very constructive notes in the margins. She thought it would be a lot nicer for the firsties than what Professor Snape usually wrote.  
  
She put her quill in the ink pot and looked up again with a dramatic frown. Snape glared. After five seconds, She put her hands on her cheeks and looked suprised.   
  
" Don't ask, don't let it get to me...." Snape muttered quietly to himself. He probably thought Dark couldn't hear him. She snickered to herself and continued correcting the papers. To bug snape, she was signing them all and drawing little smileys when the paper was a good one.  
  
After a few ours of grading papers and making faces at Snape, detention was over. Dark skipped all the way back to the common room. All that sleeping gave her a ton of extra energy. It took Dark a while to get to sleep that night. That was a bad thing, because the next day was Monday.

( I think that by now Dark would have gotten more than just one detentions.. Worry not, there will be more.)


	10. chapter ten

( I've written chapter eleven allready, but I'm too busy to upload it... After eleven, I kinda need ways for snape to get Dark back. I'm open to suggestions, since I'm too dumb to tink of thngs.)

"Are you alright Dark? Dark?"   
  
Dark snapped back to attention when she felt somebody prodding her head. She looked up to se that it was Hermione.  
  
" Yeah, I'm a'ight..." Mumbled Dark. It was only breakfast and Dark was allready worn out. She continued with her breakfast in a daydream like state. Dark really wished that it was still the weekend. She looked at a piece of parchment in her book bag, because she forgot what classes she had today. It read:  
  
Mondays  
  
1. Charms with Hufflepuffs  
  
2. Herbology with Ravenclaws  
  
3.Transfiguration with Slytherins  
  
4.Lunch and break  
  
5. Double potions with Ravenclaws  
  
6. Arithmacy with Ravenclaws  
  
Dark yawned widely. At least she got to drop history after her O.W.L.'s. That class was sure to put you to sleep. Double potions today. If she didn't fall asleep in class today, then she would complete another task. This one, she had been thinking about while she was trying to fall asleep.  
  
"29. Eat chocolate cake in class. Offer to let him lick the plate clean."  
  
She was probably hungry when she was thinking about it too... Anyways, she would have to sneak to the kitchens and get a cake during break. She would shrink it until class started. Dark laughed. It would look like the cake came out of nowhere...like a cartoon or someting.  
  
Dark got up from the table when she was finished eating. while leaving the Great hall, she saw Snape leaving as well. Another task popped into her mind.   
  
"101. Trip him up in the halls, every single chance you get." Dark smiled. Why not start this one too. It sounded like a long-term task. Snape looked pretty lost in thought, so if she was sneaky enough, she might be able to trip him.  
  
Dark walked silently behid Snape in the halls. Once she got close enough, she stuck her foot out in front of him. She thought Sanpe would be more of a cautious person to allow himself to be tripped in the hall. Nope! Snape was falling in what seemed like slow motion. Dark decided to run now, while he was still falling and distracted. He would be on her tail any second now.   
  
While running, Dark saw a tapestry on the wall, that Fred had told her was a good hiding place. Dark lifted the side of it and saw that it was like an entrance to a small room. She steadied the woven cloth, so Snape wouldn't see it moving as he ran by. Dark sure hoped that he didn't know about this room. Judging by his footsteps, he didn't. Dark took a look around the room. It was pretty big for a hiding place. It was completely empty too. Dark grinned. This room could come to great use in the future. Who knows? She would probably need a good hiding place, considering her new behavior.   
  
Dark peeked out from behind the tapestry. It was all clear. She hurried down the hall. She had a charms class to get to.   
  
After her first three classes, Dark was talking to the others about Snape's little trip. She tries not to laugh too much, because she had a feeling that Snape was going to be keeping a close watch on her. He probably knew it was her who tripped him. After lunch, Dark made her way to the kitchens. She didn't really like the thought of troubling the house elves, even though they loved working, it seemed. She asked if they allready had a small chocolate cake to spare. They quickly gave her a slice of cake. They also offered her frosting. Dark couldn't help but take it. It would make a great snack for later. Actually, she could put a big glob of frosting on the plate, so that if Snape really did take the plate, he's have something there for him. Dark thanked the elves and skipped down the halls to potions class. She was in a skippy mood....that sounds dumb...nevermind. She walked instead.  
  
Once she was outside the classroom, she used a spell to shrink the cake and plate. The other students looked at her expectantly. She just smiled at them. Dark took her seat, and Snape sweeped into the room soon after.Today was another lecture. Great. Dark preferred to make potions than to listen to a lecture about them. After a minute or so of Snape boring the class, Dark took oout her tiny slice of cake. She brought it back to it's full size, and conjured a fork. Snape was busy writing on the board, but the Gryffindors sitting near Dark noticed her eating. The Ravenclaws caught on too. Soon, Snape notced the class' diverted attention and turned around. Dark was eating the last bite of the cake. Snape just stared for a moment. Then he spoke.  
  
" Miss Smith," Gee, that was like his new catch phrase. He's been saying it a lot lately. " Please remind me of when I said that cake was allowed in the classroom." His eyes were narrowed.  
  
Dark looked up. " Hm, I really don't remember you saying that... Am I losing it, or was I not there when you said it?" She asked casually. Then she added. " You can lick the plate, if you really wanted cake that bad." She offered the plate.   
  
Snape took the plate, but did not lick it. He put it on his desk as if to confiscate it. It really wasn't her loss. Snape continued with the class, occasiponally sending angry looks at Dark. She just sat there and took notes. When class was over, Dark was the last to leave. She wanted to see what Professor Snape would do about the plate.  
  
She looked in through the door, which was opened a crack. Snape didn't seem to be paying attention, so Dark snuck in and sat on top of a desk in the back of the room. Snape looked as though he was going to throw the plate away, but he stopped. After looking at the frosting for a moment, he scooped it up with his finger and ate it. He looked happy for a moment, so Dark decided to ruin it. She pulled out her the jar of frosting she got from the kitchens.  
  
" Don't think you're so lucky, I got mre frosting than you." She said, grinning.   
  
Snape looked a bit suprised. He didn't know Dark was still there. Dark waved the jar at him.  
  
" Don't you have a class to get to?" He asked. " Oh, and leave that frosting here, Smith."   
  
Dark stood up. " Sorry, didn't hear that last part." She said. Snape took a step forward. " Gotta get to class!" Said Dark. "I think I'll eat the frosting on the way. Sorry. I'd share, but...NAA" On saying "Naa", Dark pulled down her lower eyelid with her forefinger. She had seen that in a comic before. She just made it to her last class before the bell rang. She settled in for another boring class.

(Yum, cake...)


	11. chapter eleven

( Sorry about not posting for a while. My computer isn't working right. I'm working on chapter 12 right now.)

It was nearing the end of November, and the first quiddich game of the season was quickly approaching. This meant that there was a new excitement in the air for the students. Extra training for the players, discussions on any new players, arguments over who would win, and don't forget, under the table bets on the winners of the first match. Ah, it seemed like the whole school was talking about quiddich. Especially because the first match was between the biggest quiddich rivals, Gryffindor and Slytherin. This usually meant that fights between the two houses often broke out in the halls. Dark snorted at the thought of it. Of course, she liked quiddich, but she also thought a lot of people over- reacted.  
  
Dark picked at her breakfast. French toast, bacon, and corned beef hash. Dark groaned. She didn't really like french toast for some reason. She definitely didn't like bacon, either. And hash? She wasn't completely sure that they ate that in this country. It was something her brothers liked, so she had to get used to it, no matter how much it looked like dog food. It tasted ok, though. Pretty good for dog food.   
  
After a few minutes, the swooshing of wings reached the the Great Hall. It was mail time. Dark was looking hopefully at the ceiling, and soon, two owls carrying a good sized container landed in front of her. The untied them from their burden, and let them finish off her hash. Apparently, owls liked the stuff regardless of it's appearence. After the owls flew off, Dark turned her attention to the ceramic container in front of her. There was a note on top of it.   
  
" Dakota,  
  
Sorry that this couldn't get here in time for Thanksgiving, but even a day late, enjoy!  
  
With love, Mom and Dad. "  
  
Dark smiled and opened the dish. Steam rose from it as well as the mouth wattering smell of her mother's cooking. Inside was a huge pile of mashed potatoes, some turkey, and stuffing. Everything was drenched in tons of gravy. She had almost forgot about Thanksgiving. Who could blame her though, nobody else in the school celebrated it. Oh well, being different sure had it's perks. She helped herself to her small feast, happy that she didn't eat much breakfast.   
  
Before she went down to breakfast, she had chosen another task. "102. When he leans in to see the contents of your cauldron, whack him over the head, scream "Tag, you're it!" and dash out of the classroom, giggling."   
  
It sounded like a fun chase. Also, she remembered that the task about dragging Harry to Snape's office said to make a habbit of it. Well, Harry was about due for another visit to his local Snape anyways. (Hee hee, get my funny? I said Snape in the place of Vet!.... ok, that wasn't funny. In fact, it might have been funny if I didn't try to explain my joke... I done bad =( )  
  
Dark knew that they were making simple shrinking potions today in class. It was just for a review for N.E.W.T s Ugh, just the thought of those exams made Dark feel nervous. When you call a test "Nastily Exausting," It just sounds like it is going to be horrible. Dark thought that whoever was coming up with that name must have had creativity block. " Just like the author of this story!" Dark said, looking up.  
  
Just then, Dark sprouted kitty ears. To a story, the author is the high athourity, so the characters better watch it, but then again, the author is the one who makes the characters say what they say, so in a way, I'd better watch it. I think?....INTERMISSION!  
  
Since potions class was first today, Dark didn't have much time to think her task over. She'd just have to wing it. When she got to the classroom, she chose the seat closest to the door. Right until Professor Snape swept into the room, she had been looking at the path between her and the door. She planned her escape right down to how she'd open the door. When Snape arrived, she quickly turned around. This made Snape a bit suspicious. He's have to keep an eye on her.  
  
Once instructions were on the board, Dark set to work. It was a fairly simple potion, so she got to finish it before Snape got to her. She turned off the flame beneath her cauldron. Maybe after she ran out of the class, he'd still check it. She doubted that, though. Then, Snape came walking by her caulldron. He stooped down a bit and looked in. Just as he was lifting his head, Dark took action. Whap!  
  
" Tag! You're it!!!" Dark ran like hell out the door. hearing angry shouts a distance behind her.   
  
Having a good distance from Snape, Dark turned a corner, and was able to find the statue she was looking for. It was a feirce looking horse that stood right below a small stone in the wall that stuck out. Dark had used this as an escape before, because in this part of the castle, there were big, ceiling beams. The height if them were just reachable if you climbed the statue and the wall. By the time Snape got to where she was, Dark was laying flat on a ceiling beam.   
  
At the sight of the empty hall, Snape slowed his pace. Dark held her breath. Snape stopped.   
  
" Hah!" He said. Dark's eyes grew with fear, but then narrowed with curiosity. He walked up to a suit of armor on the opposite side of the horse statue. Dark prayed that the suit couldn't talk. Nope, it didn't. Snape tapped the suit three times with his wand and the wall turned so it showed a small empty space. Dark never seen that one before. She had been showed so many hidden places by Fred and George, but not that one. It was a shame that Professor Snape knew about it. That made the whole thing useless. After a few minutes and cursewords, provided by Snape, the scowling man left, and Dark sat up. She decided to leap across the beams until she reached the staircase that lead towards the Gryffindor tower. That was where her transfiguration class was. Today they would be trying to find their inner animagus form. Dark was looking forward to this class. Dark got to the class early, because she had ran from potions before class was out. Dark was turning to get away from the tranfiguration classroom before she was caught, when she heard Professor McGonagall.   
  
" Miss Smith? What are you doing here? You should be at your potions class." She said. Her voice, which was a bit stern, like always, didn't sound too angry.   
  
Dark stopped dead in her tracks. She had to say someting. " Well, I uh... I left...early." She blushed, realizing how stupid she sounded. She had never been in trouble with her head of house, and was hoping that she wouldn't be. McGonagall looked at Dark.  
  
" You just left?" She was confused.   
  
" Yes, Profesor, something like that..." Dark didn't feel like going into depth with her story.   
  
" Well, you have been acting a bit strangely lately, Miss Smith. I am starting to get a little worried. Anyways, since you're here early, you can help me set up for today's lesson. It's an important one."  
  
" I know, Professor. I have been looking forward to it." Dark said. " And I hope you aren't that worried about me, I'm fine, honest." She added. She wasn't really sure if she was fine, though. She was wondering if she was nuts over how she felt towards Snape.  
  
Dark followed McGonagall inside the classroom, and waited for instructon. Profesor McGonagall Showed her a pile of shallow stone basins. Dark was to put one at each desk. Once that was finished, McGonagall filled each basin with water from a silver pitcher. By the time everything was done, the bell rang, and son the room was filled with Gryffindors and Slytherins. Dark sat at her seat and listened to the Professor. The class was to concentrate on the water filled basins. Then think about themselves. The basin acted as some kind of mirror, Dark guessed. After studying their appearences, concentrating on their personality, they were to think over every animal possible. It was easier if you went in alphabetical order. Hopefully, after thinking about oneself, they would allready have a slight guess about what kind of animal they would be, but if not, that's where you start thinking of every possible animal.   
  
The class sat thinking for about twenty minutes. It was almost completely silent. Dark was starting to think about what kind of animal she could be. She was kind of shy. How about a shy animal? a deer? She looked at her reflection as she thought this. Nothing happened. Wouldn't being a horse be cool? She was getting bored with thinking about herself and was just guessing now. Nope, still nothing but her face.   
  
" I like foxes, " She thought to herself. " They are thought to be cunning, but they are pretty too. Especialy red foxes."  
  
Suddenly, Dark's reflection shifted. Dark gasped, because in the basin there was the face of a red fox looking back at her. She looked down at her real nose. She still had a normal nose, but her reflection was not hers.   
  
Soon more people seemed to have found their inner form. Dark could tell, because they either gasped or looked at their basins more intently. After everybody had found their form, which took a long time, Professor McGonagall spoke up.   
  
" Very good. Now, for your assignment, read and outline chapter fifteen. It goes over transformation. It is due tomorrow. For our next class, the students who would like to become animagi (that's the plural form, right?) will be trying to transform. We might work on this all week. It takes a while to learn."  
  
As class got out, The students were buzzing excitedly about their forms and if they wanted to become an animagus. Dark was feeling excited as well. She couldn't wait to tell her friends. She hurried off to class. She knew that it would take seemingly forever for it to end. She really wanted to get to lunch. Through class, she thought about her animagus form. She never thought she was cunning, but then again, she had been pulling off those tasks. She couldn't wait to be able to transform

( Thank you Liandora Tossbottle and Mourn-today for your reviews. They made me all happy-like. Now that I have the whole day-glo pink issue cleared up, i can sleep much easier and thanks Lisandora for those good ideas....Ok time to get writing)


	12. chapter twelve

( My new favorite word is billow. I also think that I feel like writing another disclaimer because well, i miss the discaimer.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything that has to do with Harry Potter JK Rowling does -she is a genius- I do own Dark, though. Oh, and little Jonny that needed help with homework. I don't own the list- "101 ways to annoy Snape. I don't know who owns it, but they're a genius too.)

Once the bell rang, Dark was on her feet and walking towards the Great hall. She couldn't wait to tell everyone how she had gotten away with hitting Snape right on the head. Yup she was pretty good at this getting away with stuff thing-  
  
" Miss Smith," Came a farmilliar deep voice. Dark turned around slowly.   
  
" Yes, Professor?" She answered with a feeling of dread.  
  
" Your display in class today will cost you twenty points from Gryffindor and a detention with me tonight. Nine o' clock. Don't be late or it will cost you more points." With that Professor Snape walked away, his robes billowing behind him.  
  
"How's he do that?" Dark wondered aloud. " There's like no wind in here... And yet they billow. Hm, that's a funny word. Billow billooooow!" Dark continued walking to the great hall. There were a few students giving her weird look because of her talking to herself.   
  
By the time Dark sat down at the Gryffindor table, she was still smiling. She scooped some stew onto her plate, and ate her lunch, smiling.   
  
" What's so funny?" Asked Ron, who was looking at her curiously.  
  
" Billow..." Said Dark. "Oh, and I completed today's task!" She added in a cheerful note. The others were eager to hear her story, so she told it. She also told them about her animagus form. Hermione seemed excited about that. She was very good at transfuguration.   
  
The rest of Dark's classes passed by quickly. Probably because she wasn't looking forward to detention with Snape. He'd probably make her do comething nasty, like scrub stinking cauldrons.   
  
Dark knocked on the potions classroom door. "Enter" Came snape's voice. so, Dark went in. She was right about the cauldron scrubbing. In the middle of the room were about five big ol' filthy cauldrons. Snape looked up from what he was reading and gave her his usual sneer. He rummaged in one his desk drawers and tossed her a toothbrush.   
  
"Get to work, Miss Smith. No magic." He said gesturing towards the cauldrons. He was clearly enjoying the look of horror on Dark's face.  
  
" You're- you're kidding!" Dark stammered in disbelief. Snape's lip curled into a wicked smile as he shook his head. Dark scowled. Snape would have his fun, but come tomorrow, revenge would be hers. Muttering, Dark filled a bucket with soapy water and got to work, hissing foul things under her breath.   
  
After about half an hour later, Dark crawled out of the first cauldron, which was turned on it's side. Pushing the heavy cauldron back onto it's feet with much effort, Dark examined her work.   
  
"Done...well, the first one." Said Dark, dropping the toothbrush into the bucket. Snape got up to inspect the cauldron. He was silent for a moment, and then he spoke.   
  
" Miss Smith, you missed a spot.." He said Dark looked a bit annoyed by this. She wroked her ass off on the stinkin' think.  
  
" Where??" She asked a bit sharply. " There Said Snape, pointing into the bottom of the cauldron. Dark frowned. Was he just trying to bug her? She looked hard at the bottom of the cauldron trying to see if there was anything stuck in there. " What do you mean, there's noth-"   
  
In a split second, it happened. Snape gave Dark a quick shove in the back, and Dark let out a yelp of suprise, and before she knew what was going on, she was crumpled up in the bottom of the cauldron. If there was steam coming out of her ears, Dark wouldn't have been suprised. After a minute of confused squirming, Dark made it out of the cauldron. At least she did a good job cleaning it.   
  
Once out of the huge pewter pot, Dark, her eyes flashing with anger, yelled her lungs out at Professor Snape. Throughout the castle things could be heard, like " BASTARD!" or " YOU GIT!" and some other things that couldn't be heard clearly, because Dark was so angry she couldn't speak right. Once She stopped yelling, Snape looked up boredly.   
  
" Are you quite finnished, Miss Smith?" He paused for a bit, maybe waiting for an answer. When he got none, he continued. " My, what a temper... fifteen points for your little tantrum. Get back to cleaning, I daresay you've got your work cut out for you." With a smirk, he went back to his desk and graded some papers. ( o.0 I hear a noise... Woah, my little brother snores really loud...)  
  
Dark grudgingly got back to scrubbing cauldorns. It would have taken less time if she had a bigger brush. She still couldn't believe the nerve of that man! Shoving her into a cauldron! There was going to be hell to pay for this. While cleaning, Dark wondered what else Snape had in store for her. Whatever it was, She wasn't afraid. She'd prank him twice as much. Nope, Professor Snape didn't scare her at all.   
  
By the time her detention was over, it was a bit past midnight. Dark got to the common room, aching all over. Cauldron scrubbing was a lot of work. Dark went quickly to her dormatory and threw her school robe on the floor. She was asleep almost as fast as her head hit the pillow.

(Sorry for such a short chapter. I'm working on 13, so it should be done soon......BILLOW!)


	13. chapter thirteen

(Thanks for the reviews They are encouraging! Wow, wasn't that corny. I probanly wont have another chapter down for a while, i'm bust this month. Oh, by the way, today's my birthday. Dunno why I mentioned it... Have some cake! bye)

With last night's detention still in mind the next morning, Dark got out her list right after she was ready for the day. She sat in the common room for a while, looking for revenge. Her eyes scanned the list tiredly. She stopped on one task that looked interesting. it read, "18 Look terrified and leave the hall ANYTIME he picks up his spoon at mealtimes." Dark figured that at first it would confuse Snape, but he'd figure it out eventually. Then he's probably get annoyed with it. Or at least try to scare her away with a spoon. Well, if he did try that, she wouldn't scream and run away. She also figured that she'd drag Harry to his office again, along with tripping him in the halls whenever the opportunity knocked.  
  
Before long, the common room was filled with people on their way to breakfast. Dark found her friends, and told them of her plan. They agreed to her her out incase she failed to see any spoon-filled action....(Gee, that sounded weird..) Sitting at the Gryffindor table, Dark ate some toast and eggs at an alarming speed, so that if Snape picked up a spoon, she wouldn't be too hungry.  
  
Once Snape entered the Great hall, Dark kept a watch on him out of the corner of her eye. She was relieved to see that he was eating eggs, and they didn't require a spoon. Soon, however Dark noticed him pour some cream into his coffee.  
  
" Oh no, he'll stir it!" Dark thought to herself.Preparing herself for an early leave, she slipped a piece of toast into her robe pocket. Hermione saw this, and wrinkled her nose. She said nothing, though. But then Snape took out his wand and stirred the coffee by magic. Dark sighed with relief. She really didn't like making a scene, but for the sake of annoying Snape, she would. Dark kept watching her Professor, wondering if he would use a spoon, her question was answered, though, when Professor Snape dropped his fork. It seemed that he didn't want to bother picking it up, so he continued eating his eggs. With his spoon! (Gasp!)  
  
The others watched Dark interestedly. They probably were watching Snape also. Dark stood up and looked right at the spoon. Snape noticed that, because he was looking at Dark curiously. She gave the spoon a deer-in-the-headlights look, and made a girly screaming noise.  
  
"WAH!" Dark tore out of the Great hall leaving lots of confusion behind her. Once in the entrance hall, Dark started laughing. The look on Snape's face was hilarious. As well as everyone else in the great hall. She decided to wait outside of the Great hall, so that when Snape left, She might be able to trip him. Waiting, she reached into her pocket and pulled out the now crumpled piece of toast. It was still kind of warm, so she nibbled on it until she heard the scraping of chairs and feet coming from the Great hall.  
  
Dark stood back and let the mass of students pass her by. Once she caught sight of Snape, who was still in the hall, Dark ran up ahead to the corridor that went towards the way to the dungeons. Dark waited on a corner, hiding. Soon, she heard swift footsteps and a farmilliar voice muttering to himself. As the footsteps drew nearer and nearer, Dark flung her foot out from the corner. Apparently, Snape didn't see her foot, because He let out a small yell, and then hit the floor with a heavy grunt.  
  
" SMIITH!!!!!!!!" Dark tore off, but wasn't fast enough. Snape was so extremely livid, that Dark wouldn't be suprised if he tried to strangle her. Finally, Snape caught her by the hood of the robes, and since Dark was running at such a speed, well, just try to think of a cartoonish dog cetting caught up on it's lead. Dark fell flat on her ass. Her face was screwed up in a pained expression until Snape spoke. Then she went very pale.  
  
" MISS SMITH WHAT IN BLOODY HELL ARE YOU THINKING???" He demanded.  
  
" Uh......." Dark couldn't think of an excuse for that one. She just looked up into his enraged face.  
  
" Detention- eight- twenty points-.....!" Was all Snape managed to get out. He was seething. Dark watched a muscle in his eye twitch violently. If she wasn't about to soil herself in fear, she'd probably have laughed at this. Snape pulled her up by the scruff of the neck, and told her to get to class. While walking away, Dark could have sworn she has heard him muttering " Deep breaths.....Happy place..."  
  
Dark made her way to Defense against the dark arts class. At the end of the lesson, the class was assigned a two foot essay on Defensive and counter jinxes. Before leaving, Dark jokingly complained about the N.E.W.T.s standards to Professor Lupin. He just laughed, and told her to go to class. ( Yep, I decided to make him the D.A. Professor, because isn't that just what everyone really wants? ) Dark made her way to Transfiguration class.  
  
Sitting down at her desk, Dark pulled out her homework. Today they were working on becoming an animagus, if they wanted to. By the end of class, Nobody got to far. Transforming was serious and hard work. Dark was one of the most progressed students, although it wasn't really much progress. Dark had ended up sprouting a bushy fox tail, and her ears were now fox ears resting on the top of her head. looking in a mirror after this happened, Dark laughed. " I'm like, Anthro!" She giggled, making her tail wag and her left ear twitch. Professor McGonagall Smiled and shook her head.  
  
" That's a start, Miss Smith, but you need to concentrate a bit more. You might have it by the next lesson if you practice for homework. Try turning your ears back to normal." She said. Dark closed her eyes in concentration, and her tail was gone. She opened her eyes as her ears shrank back to normal. She gave her Professor a triumphant grin.  
  
By the time detention arrived, Dark was exausted and had quite a bit of homework on her mind. When she entered the potions classroom, there was a giant pile of student essays on one of the desks. Snape, who was scowling, told Dark to get to work, so Dark started grading the essays. It seemed like she was grading every first through third year in the school's essay. Most of them didn't have much wrong with them, while a few were total last minute write down anything ones. Every now and then, Snape would glance up at Dark. She started noticing that it looked like he was expecting something. This made Dark slightly nervous, yet she still graded the papers.  
  
Three quarters of the way through, it was getting pretty late, Dark noticed that the next piece of parchment was blank. She looked at it skeptically for a minute, and then looked up at snape, who was reading something.  
  
"Professor, this one is blank......?" Dark stopped and looked at the parchment. Words seemed to be bleeding onto the page. Dark shook her head and read.  
  
' What happened to the foolish girl that annoyed Professor Snape?' Is what the spindly letters formed. Dark said. " uh..." not knowing if the page could hear her. She was now certain that this is what Snape was waiting for. More words formed on the paper. ' This is what happens...' Dark had a bad feeling in the pit of her stomach. Then to her suprise, Black ink came out of the page in a thin jet, spattering ink all over her face. She screamed and threw the parchment.  
  
Wiping her eyes with her sleeve Dark glared at Professor Snape, who was, laughing? He was, the jerk. Although, Dark's anger almost vanished at the sound of it. She almost started laughing as well. For a minute, Dark just sat there and watched her Professor.  
  
Pulling out her wand, Dark said " Scourgify." and her face was almost clean. Some of the ink had stained her cheeks and nose a grey color that she would have to scrub to get rid of. Once Snape had stopped laughing and pointing like a first year, He told Dark to get back to work.  
  
It was around eleven when Dark got back to the common room. Harry and Ron, who were still working on homework at one of the back tables, looked up to see the grey scowling look on her face.  
  
" What happened to you?" asked Ron. " You're grey!" Dark glared. " Oh, really? I hadn't noticed." Her voice was dripping with sarcasm.  
  
Dark spent another fifteen minuted in the girl's bathroom attaching her face with a wet, soapy cloth. By the time she was done, her face was not ink stained, but red and raw. She dragged herself to her dorm, undressed, and plopped her sore face on her pillow. It took her a while to get to sleep that night, because all she could think about was Professor Snape's laugh.

(See y'all in a while. I got a six hour car ride to look forward to tomorrow, so not much story writing is to happen soon.)


	14. chapter fourteen

The next day was Friday. Wishing that it was Saturday instead, Dark crawled out of bed. She wouldn't have been so tired if it weren't for detention the night before. Remembering that, she groaned. She didn't feel like getting into more trouble, but she definately needed to get her revenge. Pulling on her school robes, she thought about how she'd bug Snape today. She also remembered that she needed to fear the spoons. Fun fun....  
  
" Why am I doing this again?" She asked herself. " Because it's fun." Answered a little voice in her head. After about five minuted of arguing with the little voice about what the hell it was doing in her head, Dark was ready to head down to the great hall. She had a good idea of what she was going to do today. Sitting at a seat with a good view of Snape, Dark looked down at the golden platter of food. I looked like there was nothing that needed a spoon to eat with.  
  
Putting breakfast on her plate, Dark looked at Harry. She decided that today was a good day to drag him to Snape's office. This time, though, she wouldn't tell Harry what she was doing. Looking at her schedule, Dark saw that she had no potions class today. That didn't matter, it wouldn't affect today's plan.  
  
Looking up at the head table, it seemed like Snape was watching Dark. She figured he was still puzzled as to why she ran out of the great hall the day before. Dark just cuaght his eye and smiled at him, which made Professor Snape raise an eyebrow. Turning back to her breakfast, Dark ate, staring off into space. She was very tired. She barely even blinked until somebody hit her upside the head.  
  
"What the hell?" Dark snapped. She turned to see Ginny grinning at her.  
  
"What are you planning for today?" She asked. The others were also waiting for her reply. Dark smiled "You'll see. Just try to keep up with where Snape is in the hallways.  
  
"That's too much work! Just tell us. Please?" Piped Ron. Dark shook her head. Then she got up and left the hall, smiling to herself.  
  
Walking out to the greenhouses for Herbology class, Dark was greeted by three girls that she had seen before. They were Ravenclaws and went to classes with her.  
  
"Hi." Said one of the girls. She had somewhat curly brown hair with blonde highlights. Dark knew this girl's name was Jill Bloom. Dark smiled.  
  
" Hi Jill." She said The girl next to her spoke. She was on the short side, like Dark. She had light brown and blonde hair as well. Unlike Jill's it was straight and at the moment was tied in a messy bun. She was Molly Meader  
  
"Hullo, Dark." she said shyly. " We were wondering about why you are playing tricks on Snape."  
  
"Not that we mind them," Said the last Girl, who Dark knew was named Jenn Doublen. She was the tallest of the three. She seemed a bit quiet.  
  
"We think it's great!" Said Molly. "Where do you get all those ideas?"  
  
Dark grinned. She told them about the list she had. They spent the time waiting for class t start talking. The girls were alright. Molly and Jill laughed at weird things a lot while Dark and Jenn seemed a bit confused. They all talked about the entertaining potions classed that Dark was providing.  
  
"You have to let us know when you need help with your pranks!" Jenn Doublen laughed.  
  
Dark assured them that she would. She was pretty sure that she had made some new friends, which was a good thing, because she was always bored.  
  
Professor Sprout came walking towards the greenhouse and ushered all the students cued up by the door inside. Classes passed fairly quickly for a Friday and soon it was lunch time. Dark looked at the tables when she entered the hall. To her horror, the tabled were covered with big pots of.....SOUP!  
  
Dark groaned. She'd miss this meal for sure..unless Snape are like a pig, which he didn't. Noticing that Snape wasn't there yet, Dark ladeled herself some soup, and attempted to eat it quickly. Big mistake! As soon as the spoon hit her mouth Dark squeaked in pain. She forgot, soup was hot.  
  
Professor Snape entered the hall, and Dark watched him out of the corner of her eye. She maneged to eat some of her soup while Snape was waiting for his to cool down. Giving up on burning herself Dark decided that she was better off filling up on bread, which wasn't hot. Yay...  
  
She had just shoved a big chunk of bread in her mouth when Snape picked up his spoon. Dark forced down the bread with much effort, and looked up at the spoon. Snape noticed this and looked at her quizically and Dark let out a cry of fear. Confused murmurs followed Dark as she tore out of the hall at an incredible speed.  
  
Severus Snape was left sitting in his chai looking at his spoon with a furrowed brow. Was it the spoon? Was she just trying to bother him. Well, there was no doubt to that. But why a spoon? Severus just noticed that everyone in the great hall was looking at him. He sneered and turned back to his soup.  
  
Classes passed yet again quickly, and to Dark's liking, students got Friday afternoons off. Plenty of time for Snape bugging. Walking through the halls, she caught up with the "Golden" trio. After greeting them she asked them to help her find Snape. Dark needed him to be in a hallway full of people.  
  
On looking for Snape, the search party also met up with Molly, Jenn, and Jilll. Dark invited them to come with them. She figured the more witnesses, the better. After a while, they found him on the second floor east corridor. There were plenty of people there. Dark grinned. She snuck up behind him, which wasn't hard, because there were people walking in every direction.  
  
Taking a deep breath, she shouted. " AAH! YOUR ROBES ARE ON FIRE!!!!!!!!"  
  
Snape jumped and gave a yelp. Then he turned around. When he saw Dark there he knew there was no fire. His eyes were flashing.  
  
"Miss Smith!"  
  
"You've been saying that a lot, Sir." Said Dark observantly.  
  
Snape growled, which made Dark's stomache turn. " Miss Smith. I hope you know that you wont be getting away with all of this that easily. You have a detention with me tonight at nine. Twenty points." And he was off.  
  
Laughter burst in the corridor as soon as he was out of sight. Dark went to the library for a while to work on homework until dinner. She had some catching up to do. she managed to finish her work fifteen minuted before the dinner bell was to ring.  
  
Walking towards the Great hall, Dark spotted Professor Lupin walking towards her. She smiled at him and waved. Professor Lupin stopped. Smiling, he said,  
  
" Ah, hello Dakota. Heading to dinner early?"  
  
" Dark nodded. " I have nothing else to do. I've finished all of my homework."  
  
" That's good. Tell me, have you been feeling alright lately? Ypu have been acting a bit... different." His voice was still pleasant as always, but it had a hint of seriousness to it.  
  
" Oh, i'm fine, Professor. If you're talking about me pranking Snape all the time, well..."  
  
Dark knew this was what he meant by "different" She looked up at her Professor, who was still smiling. Aww. She loved that Smile!  
  
" Why are you pranking him, anyways?" he asked. Dark honestly didn't know why anymore.  
  
" Well, at first I just wanted to do something memorable before leaving Hogwarts. Plus it's a lot of fun too." Dark laughed, and Remus shook his head. Secretly, he did agree that it was fun to watch Severus be pranked.

The two both headed down to dinner talking about Dark's new behavior. 

(Hope you liked the chapter. Um, sorry, it's been a while. School's started, and I haven't had much time to have a life. anyways, the next chapter might be a while as well, I have to think about Dark's detention and stuff. She's in for trouble, or someting like that. At the moment, i'm thinking about it. Yep. Oh, Molly, Jenn, and Jill are based on my friends and me. I'm molly by the way. I didn't use our last names, though you'd have to know us to know where the last names came from. Also, Harry will get dragged to snape's office again. I've been putting that off. Well, i've said too much and am boring you all, so, bye review, and i need help with the whole snape revenge thing.)


	15. chapter fifteen

(Sorry for the wait. Ugh, school! Here you go. Thank you, nice reviewers, you make my day.)

During dinner, Dark still kept Professor Snape on spoon-watch. She was almost dreading detention, because she had a feeling that Snape had something in store for her. She didn't have any pranks planned for detention. Shame. She continued eating dinner wondering what was in store for the evening.  
  
Desert was chocolate mousse. Dark didn't really eat any. She was busy watching Snape. Since mousse was most likely eaten with a spoon, Dark was probably going to have to leave the hall. Then, Snape deliberately caught Dark's eye. As soon as she turned to look at him, he held up his spoon in sort of a mock salute. That was her que. She squeaked with "terror" and darted out of the hall. She was really getting sick of this prank. She decided that she'd stop it.  
  
Waiting in the Gryfindor common room, Dark had a sketchbook layed open in her lap. She was lazily flipping through the pages. Most of the pictures were in manga style. That wwas really all that Dark could draw. Anime. Well, the only thing she could draw well. There were mostly drawings of made up people. A few reapearing. There were some attempted self portriats, a picture of her niffler, a picture of Sirius ( from a year ago). The second half of the sketchbook was still blank, Dark hadn't drawn much for a while, unless you counted the doodles on the margins of her notes. Soon, the clock chimed quarter of nine, and Dark thought it best to get going. She didn't want to suffer the dire concequences of being late to one of Snape's detentions.  
  
Dark made her way to the potions classroom and knocked on the door.  
  
"Enter" came Snape's voice.  
  
When Dark stepped inside the room, she saw that two other students were serving detention. They were two Slytherin boys. Second years by the looks of it. Speaking of looks, they seemed to be trying to look tough. Heh, boys. Dark knew they were probably scared of Snape's wrath. Even if they were Slytherins.  
  
Snape walked over to the three students. " You all know why you're here." He was looking more at Dark than at the two boys. Dark looked back, not faltering. " You two, you're cleaning cauldrons. Get to work." He said to the boys. " Miss smith, Madam Pomfrey needs more batches on the Acnecide potion. The supplies are all there." He gestured to one of the work benches. " Two cauldron fulls should be enough."  
  
The Acnecide potion cleared sking of acne and most other blemishes. The main indredient was diluted bubotuber pus. Ick. It wasn't too complex of a potion, still if you weren't exact the whole thing was likely to mess up.  
  
Next to the materials, there were directions on how to make the potions. Dark quickly reviewed them, and set up her cauldron. then she prepared the ingredients. While Dark was crushing some dried nettles, Professor Snape left the room to fetch something, but not before giving the three students a "you've been warned" sort of look. Once the door closed behind him, Dark spoke quietly to the younger boys.  
  
"So, what're ya in for?" She asked boredly. The boys looked at her.  
  
" Well, Gryffindor," Said one of the boys, Dark rolled her eyes, the kid thought he was some hot-shot or something. "We were teasing the Hufflepuffs. Those wimps."  
  
" Yeah, dumb first years. " Piped in the other. Dark snorted.  
  
"Oh, tough little hot-shots." She said sarcasticly. " 'Cause you're so much bigger than those firsties." This made the boys scowl.  
  
The three hushed up at the sound of Professor Snape's footsteps. He opened the door and looked from the two cauldron scrubbers, to Dark, who was adding diluted bubotuber pus to her poton.  
  
About fourty minutes had passed and Dark looked at the directions again. There was one last step. "Let stand with flame still on for ten minutes." Dark set a little timer on the work table for ten minutes. Ugh, the potion smelled horrid, of course, it did until the pus completely setted, which would be in ten minutes. Dark kept her face far away from the poton.  
  
Then an idea struck her. It was a dumb one, obviously, but fun nontheless.  
  
"Professor Snape, aren't these two so badass?" She asked, conversationally, pointing to the two Slytherins. The boys cringed at the thught of being brought to the dreaded Snape's attention. Professor Snape stared at Dark. There was a look of angry disbelief and slight amusement in his eyes.  
  
" Miss Smith, please shut up." He said, simply.  
  
The two boys sniggered. " You two, keep cleaning!" Snape barked. His voice suddenly became harsh. Dark smiled inwardly.  
  
'Ding!' The timer went off, and Dark ladeled the potion, which no longer reeked, into glass bottles. The potion produced five bottles worth. Setting up her things again, Dark got ready to make the second batch.  
  
Things were going smoothly with the second potion. Soon all there was left to do was let it sit on the flame for ten minutes. Dark had just finished setting her timer, when something caught her eye. Snape performed some sort of spell in her directon. Cringing, she expected to feel some sort of hex hit her. When she opened her eyes, she saw something that made her gasp.  
  
The flame under the cauldron was out. The foul smelling potion started bubbling vioently. Boiling. A thought struck the panicking girl.  
  
" This kind of potion has sort of an opposite reaction to heat after all of the components are added. Leaving it on the flame is like letting it cool off, or set. Turning the flame off would be like adding extreme hea---"  
  
'BOOM!' "AAAAACK!" The potion blew up. Stinky mustard colored slime went flying, and completely covered Dark. She got the sludge out of her face and breathed heaily out of shock. The two Slytherin boys were laughing childishly. Dark's glare did not stop them.  
  
When she looked up at Professor Snape, she saw him smirking in a satisfied manner. Outraged, Dark turned to the door and started to walk.  
  
"Miss Simith, I believe you have a potion to make." Snape said.  
  
Dark Sorted and made a start to run, but Snape grabbed her slimy wrist.  
  
"This is detention, Smith. You can't just leave." He said in a dangerously low voice. Dark went back to her workstation grudingly and got as much of the potion off of her as possible. It was starting to harden, and it smelled really bad. Dark groaned. She set to work yet again.  
  
By the time she was done, the other detentionees (is that a word? it is now!) had allready left. Dark left the room tired and stinky. Potion was caked in her hair, smeared on her robes, and still sort of on her face. She'd get Snape back for this, but first a shower. That would get the smell out.  
  
Reaching her dorm, Dark went into the bathroom and grabbed a clean towel. She undressed and threw her rancid clothes into a heap in the corner of the room. She turned on the hot water and stepped into the spray.  
  
Contrary to her belief, a shower did not get the smell out. No matter how mant times she shampooed her hair or scrubbed her face raw, the smell would not come out. Dark was almost in tears. She knew it would be days before she'd smell normal. A miserable heap of stench, she put on her pyjama pants and a t-shirt, and went into her dorm. The girls were all sitting on one of their beds. When they caught a whiff of Dark, they turned around.  
  
"What is that?!" Squealed one of them.  
  
"That would be me. Potions incedent." Dark said throught clenched teeth.  
  
" Oh, no." Said one of them. It was Katie Bell. Probably the only un-annoying one in the room... besides Dark that is. Heh. ( Is Katie Bell even in that year. I think she is, but uh, can anyone tell me for sure?) "We gotta help you get that out!" She said.  
  
They tried using sprays and stuff, and when they were done, Dark didn't smell like a dead thing. She smelled like a dead thing that went skipping through a field of flowers.  
  
In the end, they settled for Dark putting up a bubble like ward aroung Dark's bed. Then the stench wouldn't bother the others. Dark put a charm on herself, so that she didn't smell anything at all.  
  
"This," She thought. "Is day one of being an outcast." Groaning, she added aloud. "Snape will pay so dearly"

(So, erm, about Katie Bell. I never knew what year she was in. But tell me what you think about the story so far.)


	16. chapter sixteen

( I'm sorry about the long wait. I've had school, play practice, and homeowrk to be working on. Plus, i'm just plain lazy. Oh, and i was having trouble coming up with ideas. Anyways, here's chapter sixteen! Thank you guys so much for the reviews! Keep 'em coming. Well, I'll try to get the next chapter done sooner, but if you have any ideas, please let me hear them. I'm not too good at this story writing stuff. Ok, enjoy! )

Waking up the next morning, Dark did not smell the potion stench. After a moment of feeling happily relieved, she realized that she didn't smell anything at all. Damn charm! She took the charm off and almost gagged. Either from the smell or from her frustration, tears welled up in Dark's eyes. She couldn't go out like this. Nobody would be able to stand her presence.

That was it! Nobody could stand her! She was pretty sure that Snape fit into that caregory. It seemed somebody was going to be seeing a lot of her for a while. Crawling out of bed and pulling on some clothes, Dark thought about hat she would do for the day. It was Saturday. She could just sit in her room and hide all day. She could also bug Snape. One thing was for certain. she wasn't going to any meals. She did however, pay a trip to the kitchens.

The house elves, although they bowed politely, did not seem to enjoy Dark's smell. After apologising to the poor creatures, she handed one of the head chef elves a bottle. The small red bottle's label read, " RED HOT TOBASCO SAUCE" Dark had also added a charm of her own to the sauce. The hotness would last quite a while.

Dark told the elf that Professor Snape requested to have this in all the food in his dinner that night. The House elf nodded, and got to work. Dark left the hall with a sandwich and some pastries, and went back to her dorm to eat. While waiting for dinner, she got all of her weekend homework done early. Having still three hours until dinner, Dark got restless. She left her room and wandered the halls. she soon heard sudden singing.

" I WEAR MY SUNGLASSES AT NIGHT!" Two voices were shouting. It was Molly and Jill. Jenn walked along with them, laughing.

Dark greeted them with a smile. The three girls were glad to see her, but were asking about when she took her last bath. Dark explained her detention incedent.

" He did?!" Asked Jill. Dark nodded.

" But I'm getting my revenge. Watch Snape at dinner." Dark said, with a grin. " Tobasco will haunt Snape in his dreams." Molly and Jenn laughed. Jenn soon looked as though she realized something important.

"Dark! I have an idea!" She pulled out a bok from the bag she was carrying. It was a charms book. After reading for a couple of minutes, she waved her wand in dark's direction. In a puff of light blue, Dak smelled......good! " A charm? Why didn't I find a charm that worked?" Dark was horrified at herself.

" Oh, it was from this book. Real rare. I found it in my attic." She smiled, proud of herself. Dark thanked her about a thousand times, and the four walked together until dinner.

Once Dark arrived to the Great Hall, She took a seat between Hermione and Ginny. The Two girls noticed that Dark was watching Professor Snape's empty seat, and knew that something was up. They bugged her to tell them what she had planned, but Dark just told them to watch. Snape arrives about five minutes later. Dark kept stealing glances out of the corner of her eye. She couldn't wait for him to start eating his caserole. Dark Smiled to herself.

Professor Snape picked up his fork and scooped out a piece of caserole. He took a bite. and chewed slowly.

" Hm, kind of spicy." He thought. A few seconds his thoughts turned to, " MERLIN! This is bloody hot! AARGH!" Tears welled up in the wizard's eyes as he started breathing through his mouth. He took a gulp from his goblet, and realized that his spiced pumpkin juice was seriously "spiced" He wouldn't be suprised if he started breathing fire.

Dark watched with eyes gleaming as Snape was practically sweating from the tobasco. She watched him pick up his piece of bread. " Nice try, Sev!" Thought Dark. Snape shoved the bread in his mouth, no longer caring about table manners. He reminded Dark of a chipmunk. she laughed as Snape's face grew red. She could have sworn that steam was pouring out of his ears. Finally he conjured a goblet of ice water and was chugging it. Once he realized that not even chewing ice cubes would work, he sprinted out of the hall, knowing that only a potion wold help him. Dark in the meantime was on the ground under the table laughing. Nobody seemed to notice it, though. Dark hoped Snape wouldn't suspect her for this.. Although he probably would. Well, now that that was over, Dark would have to prepare for Snape's revenge, then, back to the list! This cycle seemed never ending..

( Ok, sorry this chapter was a bit short. I'm er in a creative slump,I guess. REVIEW!! If you'd like to reach me for any comments and such, my e-mail is Or you can try meon AIM at dragonwing694 if you want to tell me what you think of the story, give me ideas, yell at me to get my ass typing, or just talkI guess. I get bored. Mmyep, that's it. )


	17. chapter seventeen

(( Well, i hope that this chapter is better than the last one.. i'm pretty sure it's longer. I updated it quicker, too!! Although, the only thing that got me working on the computer is the music i have... I needed an excuse. Um, yeah... thank you so much for the reviews. That's the only reason I keep this up. So, enjoy and i'll try to update soon.))

Disclaimer: Not mine... I don't even make money out of it... Oh, but Dark's mine, so keep ye scurvy hands off! acts like anyone wants to use Dark feh, right.

Over the next couple of days nothing happened. The days were calm. It was a kind of unnerving calm though, for Dark at least. she was preparing herself for the worst of Professor Snape. she read her list, and had a new task ready. Actually she had a few. First, there was " 16. Squeak softly everytime he says your name during roll-call." This would be a small long term project. There was also, "50. Leave anonymous notes on his desks. Have them say things like 'Remember the summer in 72, Severus dear?' or 'Meet me in the restricted section.... and bring a friend!' " Dark would have fun with this one. The big task she had in store, was " 13. Become his 'Good-Snape' and 'Bad-Snape'. (Ie. Put your head over his shoulder and advice him according to wich Snape you are. Then switch shoulders and say the opposite. Use a silly voice.)"

This one would need the perfect timing. she figured she'd wait until he was about to tell somebody off in the hall or someting like that. If finding the oppourtunity for that took too long, she would beg one of her friends to be a decoy. That wouldn't be too hard. In the meantime, she sat there and doodled pictures of little cartoon-like angels and devild sitting on a angry and confused Snape all over her Defense against the dark arts notes.

Professor Lupin, who was walking around the room, looking at everyone's work over their sholders ( quite like some teachers that I know...although, I don't see the point in mentioning that...) saw Dark's masterpiece and chuckled. " What are you up to now, Dakota?" he asked, with his warm smile. He was very good at detecting mischeif.

Dark gave a sly smile. " Well, maybe if you'd stop reading over my shoulder, I'd let you in on these kinds of things. Do you know how much I hate people reading over my shoulder?"

" I guess not." He said, picking up her parchment. " Here, I'll read it not over your shoulder." He grinned and read her notes. " Good, now stop doodling and get back to work." With that he was off to the next student to read over their shoulder.

Dinner went well that night. Dark was a bit afraid to eat, but after a while, hunger got the best of her. It turned out that her food was not a bit tainted in any way. She didin't even get sick way after, like she feared she would.

After finishing her homework, Dark curled up in a plush armchair by the fire, and drew in her scetchpad. She decided that the angel and devil picture needed a bit of work, and then would be a great addition to her book, so that was what she was working on. She was soon interrupted by "The golden Trio" Dark looked up from her work.

" Hey." she said in a sleepy voice.

They looked at the almost finished picture. " Cool," Said Ron.

" What is it supposed to mean?" Hermione asked, regarding the cartoon.

" My next task." Dark replied brightly. The other's faces lit up with understanding,

" Oh, you're going to do that one next?" Harry asked with a grin.

" No," said Dark. " I only said it was my next task to be funny!" Her voice was thick with sarcasm. The sly smile she wore earlier was back on her face. She went back to her drawing, and the others watched for a while.

The first class of the day for the seventh year Gryffindors was potions with the Ravenclaws. Dark stretched and yawned at her desk, waiting for class to start. She sat next to Jenn Doublenn, who was talking to Jill and Molly. Dark was half listening to their conversation. just as the clock struck eight, the door to the classroom swung open with an ominous creak as Professor Snape made his theatrical entrance. Dark rolled her eyes. Drama queen...

Class started as usual, Snape was taking the attendance. He called al the names and was replied by "here". When he finally got to " Smith, Dakota", Dark let out a soft squeak. Snapes eyes snapped up to see the source of the noise... as if he didn't allready know.

"Smith" Was his warning. He waved his wand and the instructions were on the board. " You are to make this potion and guess which potion it is. Start now." And he was off to his desk to grade papers, or whatever he did. Dark wondered if he really had that many papers to grade, or if he was just trying to look busy. Maybe doodling, Or was it for the order? Dark settled with the idea that he was just writing some trashy romance novel... Mentally she was giggling at the thought. That just seemed the un-Snapish thing to do.

Dark quickly got to work on her potion. One glance told her that it was the Malbella potion. it temporarily made people ugly... It seemed to Dark, a stupid potion, but whatever. It made for a good disguise.

As class ended, it sounded like a scuffle had started out in the hall. Professor Snape had rushed out of the room, ahread of the students, to put a stop to whatever was going on. As the class left too, eager to check it out, Dark got out a piece of parchment. She also took out a fluffy pink quill that she has swiped from her dorm...with every intention of returning it, of course. It was one of those quills that girls used for secret admirer notes. It was like the quick quotes quill, exept pink and frilly, and a lot more acurate.

Standing the quill on the parchment, Dark thought up somehting to write. " Meet me in the room of reqiurements, Sevvy, darling. Tonight at midnight!"

Dark stepped forward, admiring her handiwork. She placed the note on his desk, and left ther room quickly. She wondered if he'd flip when he read it. Although, he'd probably just throw it out. Either way, she completed another task. Kind of, anyways. She probably should leave a few more notes another time.

Coming back from her thoughts, she saw what the commotion from a minute ago was. Two boys had gotten into a fight. They looked like a Slytherin and a Gryffindor. Both fifth years. Ginny was in the crowd of onlookers as they all watched a livid Snape tell off the boys. Dark strode up to the center of this.

Putting her chin on Snape's left shoulder, she spoke in an evil little voice." I think, they should both get detentiond! TAKE POINTSSSS!!!!!!"

Snape turned to see Dark's head with little horns sticking out of her hair. " Smith! Go away!"

Dark changed shoulders. " No, boys will be boys, you know..." A little halo hovered over her head.

" MISS SMITH!!!" Snape's face was red with fury. " You take your annoyance and your quick image altering spellwork and get OUT OF MY SIGHT!" he snapped. " Ten points from Gryffindor." He added.

Dark quickly walked off with Ginny in tow. " Dark, that was great!" she squealed. Dark found herself grinning.

" Of course it was! I did it!" she laughed. " I left a note for task 50, too."

" Eh?" Ginny was confused. Dark forgot to tell the others about which tasks she was doing. After Dark pointed out which task she meant, Ginny smiled. " So what did you write?"

" Somehting like meet me in the room of requirements at midnight." Dark answered. She also decided that she would go to see if he really came.

After classes had ended for the day, Dark sat at the dinner table waiting for Harry. When he finally came, along with Ron and Hermione, the three sat down with Dark.

" Can I borrow your cloak again, Harry?"

" When? I got to get some snacks from the kitchens tonight"  
" A bit before midnight. I left a fake love note to Snape and I want to see if he fell for it. It said to meet him at the room of requirements."

" Sure, but only if I get to come. This I got to see."

The rest of dinner passed way too slowly for Dark. She spent it asking Harry why he needed to get snacks. It turned out that the boys in his dorm were having a sort of party. He would get the snacks at nine, hang out with the boys, and Meet dark in the common room at quarter to twelve.

Dark, 'Mione, and Ginny all sat in the common room and chatted, until it was time for Dark to go. They had a good time, the girls needed to do this sort of thing more often, was their conclusion. It being friday night, they could do the same thing tomorrow night.

The clock on the mantle chimed once signaling quarter of twelve. A minute later, Dark and Harry were creeping down the corridor under the invisibility cloak. They made it to the entrance of the room of reqirements and went inside. Dark furrowed her brow in concentration, and on one wall of the fairly large room stones formed sort of a ladder going onto a loft. The two kept a lookout from there. Just as the stone ladder dissapeared, the big clock of the castle struck tvelve. Any minute now the'd know if the fake note worked.

(( Yay, cliffhanger. I swear, i wouldn't have left it like this, but I have no clue what to do next. HELP MEEE!!!! Should Snape come? catch dark? And well, it's obvious Dark has some sort of morbid obsession with Snape. What of that? SUGGESTIONS! Reviews, e-mails, IM's anything.... dragonwing694 S/N Until next time!))


	18. chapter eighteen

(Ok, here is chapter 18! I am soo happy that you all review. I took some of you guys' advice, kind of. I'll say that er, there is a big twisty suprisey thing in this chapter. I'm not sure if I'm that sure of this chapter.. Well read, enjoy, and tell me if it's any good. Thanks again for all of the reviews!)

Just as The clock began to chime, Harry looked as though an idea struck him.

" Dark," he started. " You knw, if Snape comes he's going to be really mad."

Dark looked at Harry. " Yeah... but he's always mad at me..." She said. Harry didn't seem to take that as comforting. " Fine, go on and ditch me. I'll be fine." she gave in, rolling her eyes. Harry gave an apologetic look and hopped off of the loft.

Just then, the door to the room opened. Harry, invisible, snuck past no other than Severus Snape, who's onyx eyes were scanning the cavernous room. " Ah, " He said quietly,  
" I thought that this would probably be the case...." With a wave of the wand, the loft seemed to dissapear, causing Dark to fall on her ass. She looked up into Snapes hard stare.

" Miss Smith, how unexpected." he said with much sarcasm. Dark noted that he sounded a little put out.... She figured the poor guy hadn't gotten any for a while....

" I must admit, you almost had me there on that little trick..." He said. " But of course, what else could have been expected?"

Dark stood up slowly, she realised that she still had a hand on her sore bottom, and quickly removed it. She still kept eye contact, her stomach felt like it was doing flips.

Professor Snape continued speaking. " but of course, who would want to meet up with a 'slimy git' like myself?" He asked icily. He took a step forward that this would either make her feel worse about her actions than she looked, either that or get a answer out more quickly.

Dark muttered something that was bartely audible.

" What was that, Miss Smith?" He asked, taking another step. He didn't realize that this intimidation attempt wasn't working exactly the way he thought it was.

" I don't think that you're a greasy git, Sir." Her voice was not much louder than before, but just loud enough that Severus could hear it.

" Oh? " He raised an eyebrow, wondering where this was going. " Is that true, Miss Smith." He used the same voice as usual. He couldn't help but wonder if she had meant what she said.

" No, sir, I don't. In fact I think you're quite--" Dark cut herself off realizing what she was saying. She felt a blush spread across her cheeks. Then she realized how close Snape had gotten. Her palms began to sweat and she caught her self stop breathing for a second. She stood there looking up at him, flustered and slightly dizzy.

" Well then, Miss Smith, are you going to finish that sentence, or are you going to keep gaping at me like a fish out of water?" His features grew softer, including his voice, but he still had his air of sternness about him.

" I'm not gaping.... I was just... er..." Dark was at a loss for words. She had noticed that she was practically backed into a corner. She wondered what Professor Snape was thinking.He was looking at her, but she had the feeling that he was looking straight into her mind. She faintly remembered a quote about eyes being portals to one's soul, or something like that.

Severus was staring straight into Dakota's eyes. There was some emotion in them that he couldn't quite figure out. Was she about to say what he thought she was going to say. He knew that her words had truth to them. It didn't take legimency to see that. He had never realy looked at the girl before. She had grown a lot since she first came to the school. It was shocking to think that this was the tiny, scared looking first year standing somewhat hidden in the crowd, waiting to be sorted. Now she was a young lady about to leave for good. Althought she was still short, she had gotten a lot taller since she arrived. They all do.

Her short balck hair framed her face, which was colored with a pink blush from embarassment. Her violet eyes were shiny, like amethysts. She had never been the prettiest of her classmates, but she was alluring when you took the time to notice her.

Severus mentally started. Was this really what he was thinking?! Admiring the annoying twit's beauty? And for what? She would never return any feelings. He was the cold hated Professor that lived in the dark and dank dungeons. To many students, an overgrown bat, or bird of prey. Little did he know how wrong he was.

Time seemed to have stopped. What was the man thinking? Dark had not removed eye contact. She felt a mix of feelings, and didn't know to explain it. She had to say something, the silence was strarting to get to her... not to mention she was bad at the whole eye contact thing.

" Professor, I..." She didn't know what to say. Words were not neccesary, because Severus had lowered his lips onto Dark's. Dark responded, allowing the kiss to deepen.

Dark wondered if this was actually happening. She had developed such a crush on the potions master in the past few months, but since she was making a habit of ruining his day, she thought it would just be a hopeless fancy... Although this kiss could mean nothing after all.

"Funny.." Dark thought, ad she wrapped her arms around Severus's neck. She had dated so many boys, and she never thought that she would ever find a good kisser. Maybe bad kissing was just a Gryffindor thing...or maybe she just dated losers.

The reality of the situation had finally sunken into Severus's mind. He was kissing a student. An annoying one at that. And the terrifying thing about it was that he alomst felt he was enjoying it. She was, of course and adult now, but still. Dakota Smith?? When the two broke off the kiss they stared into each others eyes. Had she enjoyed the kiss as well? It seemed that way.

" Well I guess that means it's the end of your little tricks, Dakota?" He asked in a smooth voice. Was that a smile on his face?

"I don't think so." She answered with a smirk. So that was the game.

" Fine by me Dakota, but don't expect me to go easy on you. If you can make my life miserable, I can extract my revenge." He purred in Dark's ear.

Dark was about to snap at him for calling her Dakota, when she found that she didn't mind it. But only he could call her that. It only sounded good when he said it. When she told him this he laughed. This made Dark almost melt.

" Not get yourself back to Gryffindor tower, Smith, or I'll take points." He said, turning towards the door.

"Hey!" She called after him. Severus turned around. "Aren't you going to say goodnight?" She pretended to be offended. Severus strode over to her and cupped her cheek with his hand. He placed a swift kiss on her lips and was gone. Dark practically skipped the way back too her dorm.

Thus started the very odd and possibly love-hate relationship between Dakota Smith, and Severus Snape...I think!

(oooo! What happened?! what do you think was it the right thing for me to do? Did I get all sappy? Is it obvious that I such at writing? Or........was it good? I think I kinda got OOC on this one. You know what to do now!)


	19. chapter niniteen

( I'm sorry about the wait. I've been really lazy -Cough- I mean busy, oh yeah! Any writer's block. Ok, so anyways, I'd like to thank one of my reviewers, Becca, for the great idea I put in this chapter. Ayways, thanks for your input, everyone. And enjoy!)

" AAAARGH!! DARK GERROFF!!!!" A screaming Harry Potter was once again being dragged down the hall, this time very unwillingly. Panting from the difficulties of getting down the stairs leading to the dungeons, Dark gave him a little kick in the shin.

" You were in full support of the list, Potter, deal with it!" She continued pulling her very unhappy friend. " This is for bailing out on me."

Harry suddenly looked a bit guilty. " What happened anyways, did you get in trouble? Did Snape catch you?" ha asked.

" Oh, yeah, he caught me." She muttered. She didn't intend to give any details. The two continued on walking. Harry was cooperating a bit more now that Dark made him feel bad for her. On reaching the wooden door of Professor Snape's office, Dark started yelling loudly. Harry started struggling once more. All the guilt in the world couldn't make him want to face the dreaded potions master.

" I got 'em! I GOT 'EM! " Dark shouted. The noise caused Snape to open his door, looking furiously at the two. " I' got 'Im, sir!" She said brightly, grinning very cheesily.

" Miss Smith, did I ask you to fetch me Potter?!" He snapped.

Dark looked as thought she was in a deep thought. " Ummm, Yes." She said. "Here he is!" She chirped and skipped away. This time, she wasn't being flollowed. It was probably the skipping. Too bad she had potions class first today.

Walking into the potions classroom, Severus snape surveyed the room with his usual cold gaze. His eyes lingered on a certian Gryffindor who was now chatting happily with her newfound Ravenclaw friends. He realized that the class was still talking even though he was in the room. He supposed trying not to makie his usual dramatic entrance was just a poor decision, and he cleared his throat.

Having the class' attention, Snape began calling the roll. He read all of the names alphabetically, and everyting was going smoothly, until,

" Smith, Dakota,"

Squeak

" What was that, Miss Smith? " He asked with an eyebrow raised, He could have sworn that she just squeaked.

" I said 'here' Sir." She said as if nothing happened.

With that out of the way, the class began. Dark sat in her seat, listening to Professor Snape's lecture of the day. Yawn.

Today we will be looking over the properties of a more advanced healing potions. Unlike what you allready know, this potion heals more wide and deep gashed as well as supplies excess energy, taken away from the healing process...."

Dark raised her hand. She waited for the Professor to look at her as if to say ' What, you little twit?' " Forget healing potions, Sir, let's bottle some fame!" She said rather enthusiastically. The whole class chuckled at the reference to their Professor's " Welcome to potions...you're doomed." Speech he probably said to every first year class he ever taught.

Severus could feel his eye twitch. He didn't know what bothered him more. Interrupting his class, or poking fun at his speech that he had kbeen so proud of. He came up with that himself you know. He took a deep breath and looked back to Dark. " After class, Smith."

Dark gave a small nod and the lecture continued. There were apparently a lot of things to know about this potion. Dark, herself, just wanted to brew it. It sounded like a challenge. Class dragged by slowly. They listened to Snape, read, took notes, but no potion making for today.

After class Dark put her book and notes away slower than everyone else. There was no rush, having to stay after class and all. As the last of her classmates filtered out into the corridor, Dark gathered her Gryffindor courage and approached Professor Snape's desk. She was fixed with a glare and she awaited her punishment.

" Nice little outburst in class, Smith." He said sarcastically. Back to the ol' last name basis, eh? " I assume you're just proving your word about not letting up on your little game?" He purred in a dangerous tone. " The way you're acting, it's going to come back to get you..."

Dark loked into Snape's eyes. Was he thinking about last night's events? He sounded so cold. She decided to try to pester the coldness out of his voice. Even heated anger was better than this. She put on a smirk. This seemed to work.

" Trying to scare me, are you? Well it's not working. You can do your worst, and it won't even amount to anything you can call revenge." She said cooly. Severus seemed to be catching on. Dark turned and strode out of the room angering Snape, because he hadn't finished yet.

Dark on the other hand had her mind at work. Shae couldn't help it, inspiration struck. She pointed her wand at an empty broom closet and did the trickiest spellwork she had ever done in her life. After a bit of draining work, her trap was set! She just had to wait until Dear ol' Sevvie came after her. Which was very soon, seeing as he always had to have the last word.

Dark stood smugly by the door to the closet as the Potions Master approached.

"Miss Smith, what is that smug look on your face?" He asked.

"Whatever happened to Dakota? That one didn't last long." She said pretending to sound hurt.

" You really need to earn these sort of things, and you definately lost it for now." He replied

" Well, maybe I could make up for it." She said suggestively, her eyes trailing towards the closet. She watched Snape's face. He still looked stern and not likely to go for that. The puppy eyes almost worked. She grabbed onto his arm.

" Pleeease? "

Snape gave in. He opened the closet door and walked in. Instead of Dark following, she closed the door on Snape leaving him stuck in the broom closet.

" Hey, WHAT?!?" boomed Snape's voice. " Smith, you get me out of he- What is that?? " He sounded as if he just found something, or in this case, a lot of things. Soft fluffly living things. The were bunnies. Severus Snape couldn't believe it. Stuck in a closet full of bunnies.

" Sorry, Sevvie! Only you can get yourself out of there." Dark said with glee.

" How." Came Severus' s voice through the door.

" Cuddle a bunny. " She said.

Severus nearly screamed every profane word in his vocabulary. Snape Cuddle and Bunny were three words never to go together. He sighed, why did he have to fall for such an annoying woman, and why couldn't he stop it?

( There you have it, another chapter! And what did you think? I will try to post the next one sooner, but I dunno, midterms are in a couple weeks. Dun dun dunnnn! Ok, erm, R&R, please, and remember to always bucke up... It's the safe way!)


	20. chapter twenty

(Hello again! I know I'm slow to post, but I'm pretty sure this one got up sooner than the last one. I have some serious writer's block. I'm also in the middle of Midterms week.yuck But at leat today I had a free period. I got to hang out with my friend and watch POTC in the tech room. The pluses of having friends in tech crew.. Um anyways, I've been inspired by the movie Edward Scissorhands. I put up a fic for that, too. It's called like... " Whatever It May Be, It Will Be Amazing" I think that's it. I hope it'll catch on like this one has. So, here's chapter 20! Enjoy!)

The bell rang, signaling dinner time for everyone at Hogwarts. There was a lot of bustling going on throughout the halls. Students chattering and ghosts floating by. And a very grumpy Ron Weasley standing in the middle of it. The Golden trio was standing in the entrance hall waiting by the grand staircase.

" But 'Mione, I'm huuungry." Groaned Ron, sounding like a small child sick of clothes shopping with his mother. Or at least that's what it reminded Hermione of.

" And do your feet hurt too? Are you sick of old ladies?" She asked a bit annoyed by his whining. He was so immature. " We told Dark we'd wait here. She'll be coming along any second now."

Harry was somewhat amused by the two. Their bickering was so pointless that it was almost funny. He waved to some of the other Gryffindors as they passed.

Dark heard the bell ring, and got up from her seat at the library. She had been doing her homework. Walking down the hallway, someone clear their throat behind her. She turned to see her dear Professor Snape. He looked a bit angry and was holding a fluffy grey bunny.

He thrust the bunny into Dark's hands, as if it hurt for him to touch it. " Why didn't this one go away like the others?" He demanded, wiping some loose fur from his hands.

Dark beamed at him. " You cuddled it." she said. " It feels all loooved!" With that she huggled the bunny. " Aww, you're all soft. And grey. I'll call you Dusty." Her voice was high pitched.

Watching her talk to the bunny, Severus couldn't help but smile. She could be very caring, and yet so evil. He spoke again. " If you're done with that now, I think my owl would like a treat." He smirked, he knew he wouldn't do it, but the looke on her face would be amusing.

" What?!" She asked. " No, I just named him! You can't do that once you name him!" She said. Severus chuckled to himself. Dark went to the Entrance Hall to meet her friends.

" Nice bunny."

" Thanks... let's eat."

But it seemed that the others wanted to know where Dark's furry friend came from. Once her story was finished, the others faces with laughter. " He cuddled it?!" Hermione managed to gasp through her laughter. Dark smiled and nodded.

After dinner, Dark went up to her room, and transfigured a goblet into a cozy little basket for her new buddy. She smiled with satisfaction, and put Dusty to bed. She was in the mood for a walk. She had a lot of things on her mind.

Casually strooling the corridors, Dark saw Ginny doing the same. She greeted the redhead, and they walked together. After a lot of pleading on Ginny's behalf, Dark finally told her everything that was bothering her.

" Seriously? Snape? That's um, well, how'd you manage that?" Ginny asked in disbeleif. She almost seemed impressed. " I can understand the older men thing, but that's a bit...old. How'd you do it?" She continued, when she noticed Dark wasn't going to answer the first question. " Well?"

" Quite frankly, I dunno." Dark shrugged. " I don't know how. I don't know where it's going.... But you should have heard him when he realized I tricked him into a closet full o' bunnies!" Dark grinned. " Coulda' made a pirate blush." This one earned her an odd look. She just smiled and shook her head.

ooolookittheprettytransition......Ineedtomovethisstoryalong.......wheeeeeeeeeeeee

Christmas came and went very quiclky, at least to Dark. She went home for the hollidays to see her family. It was really nice.

Now that she was back in school, Dark was ready to study for her N.E.W.T.S, and also to continue with her quest of annoyance.... But seeing as it was Saturday, and a Hogsmeade trip day. Things had to wait a bit.

Walking down the cobbled roads, Dark chatted with her Gryffindor companions. Theybought loads of chocolate from Honeydukes. It was on sale from after the holliday rush. Dark had a butterbeer in the Leaky Cauldron with her friends. It was a good start of the new term, but soon the work would pile up again.

As the sun was getting low, Dark headed back towards the castle. She walked alone and in silence until someting caught her attention. Actually, that would be an understatement. A snowball had made contact with the back of her head.

Dizzily trying to regain her footing... as well as the memories from her fifth year of life, Dark looked frantically around to see the source of the snowball. This was made difficult by the brightly colored spots still dancing in front of her eyes from the sudden impact.

" Whho dunnit... sonuvaaah....." She slurred. Then she spotted Professor Snape, who was standing nearby with a smirk on his face. He waved.

" Who's that?!" Dark asked, pointing to a space behind Snape. When he loked around, Dark scooped up some snow in her mittened hand and waited.

" There's nobody - oof!"

Dark laughed. " Oh, come on! You fell for that?! It's elementary, that one!" She laughed harder, accidently snorting loudly. Not even Severus could contain his laughter at that. Thus started the greatest two person snowball war Hogwarts had ever seen. It lasted for about half an hour, before a panting Dark fell over on her back after being brutally whitewashed. Severus sat down, also worn out. Dark, having to have the last input, lazily threw loose snow at him.

( Short? I am in a total creative slump here, so I'm sorry. I got exams on the mind. I'll start on the next chapter after this week.)


	21. chapter twentyone

( Here's another chapter! I would like to thank everyone for the nice reviews. And some of you have given me great ideas, too! I'm sorry about the wait. I have two fics to think about, not to mention school. But I think that I have an idea of what i'll put in my next chapter, so It might not be too long a wait... I am lazy, though, so it's something you all will have to deal with. ' . I have an Edward Scissorhands fic that I'm working on, if you want to check it out. It's a bit different. Not so much humor. Well, here you go!)

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The list was starting to get boring. Dark had a lot of ideas in her head that were not down on paper. So, she decided to start doing as she pleased. After getting dressed and washed up for the day, Dark slipped down to the common room and sat in an armchair in the corner of the room. It was pretty empty for a Sunday morning, but still, Dark needed to concentrate on what she was doing.

Transfiguration was tough, especially when trying to create a plastic muggle toy. In the end she was pleased with her work. She had managed to transfigure a water goblet into a brightly colored water gun. A big one, too. This was no water pistol, this was one badass super soaker! It even had a back pack water tank. ( That was the tricky part)

Dark strutted down the hallway with her badass new toy. She was trying to look like someone out of an action movie, and wasn't too sure she was doing it right. She was wearing dark sunglasses and a long black trenchcoat over her plaid skirt and t-shirt. She was earning a lot of odd looks for it, too. Not like she really cared. The few suckers that sniggered at her, she gave them a nice spray with the water gun, and skipped away down the hall.

Luckily for Dark, most of her victims were Slytherins. This sped up her plans, because as she assumed, they all went complaining to Snape. Of course, he was going to take some action on this. Dark was walking down the hall when she heard the fast even strrides that could only belong to Severus. She saw him round the corner, and they both stopped walking. Dark had a grin on her face that clearly said ' Run! Run as fast as your legs can carry you! For the love of God, Snape, RUN!!!' But of course, he did not run.

" I have had five of my students complain about you squirting them with a muggle water toy. You have no excuse to have been tormenting your peers." He snarled.

"Of course I had a reason! The were laughing at me. Of course I wasn't setting out to torment the students..." She said with a sly smile.

" Is that so, Miss Smith?" Snape was starting to realize her intentions. He was getting ready to get ayaw as quickly as he could.

Dark's smile widened and there was an evil glint in her eyes. She aimed her super soaker at Snape, and pumped the gun threateningly. Snape turned and started to run, but Dark was on his tail.

She let out a warrior cry " LEEDLE-LEEDLE-LEEDLE-LEEDLE-LEEEEEEE"  
And she was sprinting down the corridors holding the gun above her head. When she got close enough to Sevvie, She opened fire.

"AAAARGHH!!!!!" Severus yelled. People were swarming the halls after the two to see what was causing the comotion.

" LEEEEEEEEEDLEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!"

Dark ran along, pumping the gun. Snape was running for his life... and dryness, but it was way too late for that.The chase lasted a long time, because of the capacity of the water pack strapped to Dark's back. Soon enough, though, the fun was over.

Dark had managed to trap her dear Sev into a corner. She grinned with malice while Snape cowered in fear. She pulled the trigger.

"ppfffft......pufff" Nothing came out but air. The water tank was almost weightless. She had ran out of ammunition. The tables were tuned, and Dark got a face full of some sort of water blasting spell.

" That's a detention, Smith. Tonight at nine." Snape drawled. " Don't think it will be easy, either." It was obvious that Professor Snape was thoroughly pissed off. Dark sighed inwardly. At least she did her job well. It would cost her, though.....' He's kinda cute when he's mad.... In a scary way' Were her final thoughts before turning around and marching to her dormitory.

When she got to her room, She grabbed some warm, dry clothes and trudged off to the bathroom. She re-dressed in some jeans and a long sleeved shirt, and wrung the water out of her hair. She cringed at the mirror when she noticed that her head resembled a wet mop. After a quick drying spell, her look improved. A dry mop was much better.

The rest of the day was full of homework and bored doodles. she ate dinner, and soon it was almost nine. She left through the portriat hole, smiling to herself about how awesome that squirt gun chase was. Hopefully the pusishment would be survivable.

Walking into the potions room, she allready knew she was in for a terrible night. Well, she didn't mean to jump to conclusions, but a trap water bucket set above the door was never a pleasant suprise. Nope, not at all. Snape's kind offer for somehting to dry with was merely him throwing a hankercheif at her.

" Gee, thanks...." She muttered, grumpily dabbing at her face so she could at least see properly. She then remembered that she was a witch, and cast yet another drying spell.

Her assignment for the evening was to clean out cauldrons. She didn't like this, beacuse she had many nightmares about being eaten by cauldrons after being shoved in one. She didnt' let that show, though. She was too angry. She filled a bucket with soapy water, grabbed a rag, and set to work. Halfway through the first cauldron, she had an idea of how to pget back at Snape.

" Severus?" She asked. She could tell Snape was mad and probably glaring, because the sound of a scatching quill stopped, and the room was tensely silent.

" What?!" He hissed. Dark knew he meant to say " What did you call me?" She ignored the tone of his answer and continued.

" Do you use a sponge when there are char marks that won't clean off?" She asked, pointing to the cauldron.

" Yes, and do NOT call me that!" He snapped.

" Sev.....?" She asked.

" SMITH!!!"

" Can you pass me the sponge, please? She asked with an innocent voice. She was rewarded with a sponge whipped at the back of her head.

" I said, do NOT call me that!" He hissed.

" You said not to call you SEVERUS."

She continued cleaning the cauldron. " Sevvie-kins?" Snape's head thudded on the desk. Dark looked up. He was clearly irritated, and now his face was hidden, flat on the desk.  
" Are you alright, Precious Little Sevvie-kins?"

" THAT'S QUITE ENOUGH!!!" Severus snapped. He stood up out of his chair so quicklt that the chair toppled over. In three big stepps, he was towering over Dark.

To his suprise, Dark pinched his cheek. " Somebody's gwumpy..." She said as if she were talking to a two-year-old. Severus caught Dark's hand in his...

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( Oooh, a cliffhanger. What is gonna happen? No really, I don't know..... heh)


	22. chapter twenty two

( Ok, sorry 'bout the wait, I'm busy lately. I'd like to thank Demonofdoom for the great idea I used in this chapter. Hope the cliffhanger didn't kill you all.)

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( Soap opera theme music plays)

" Last time on General Hosp- Oh, shoot, wrong script" Ruffling of papers is heard "Ok, last time on Coke, Jeans, and Annoying Snape.."

Severus caught Dark's hand in his... He smirked as Dark's face flushed with pink and her eyes grew wide and shiny. He slid his arms around her waist, pulling her closer to him. Dark stood on the tips of her toes and rested her cheek on his shoulder.

After a moment of this embrace, Severus's hand cupped Dark's cheek and their lips met. Dark wrapped her arm's around his neck. Their kiss became more passionate. ( oh, my)

After breaking apart, Severus saw a look of longing in Dark's eyes. He realized that the feeling was mutual, but he decided not to push it for now. Instead, he regaind his smirk. " Well, those cauldrons aren't going to clean themselves, Dakota..." Shoot he didn't mean to call her that!

" But, I really don't feel like scrubbing cauldrons anymore..." She said, giving the puppy eyes. She knew this probably wouldn't get her out of chores. Sighing, she went back to work.  
" Sev..." She whined. "This is boring." She was getting mad at him for getting her hopes up. She thought she wouldn't have to continue with this after their little kiss. She assumed she was wrong.

After about five minutes of trying to finish grading papers, Severus found himself too distracted by Dark, who was grumbling to herself and cleaning a cauldron. He soon gave in and snuck up behind the girl, grabbing her around the waist. The rest of detention went rather smoothly from there.

Dark woke up the next morning to see both Hermione and Ginny hovering over her. It was still dark out and looking at the clock, it was only 5:30.

" Oh, come on, it's early" Dark grumbled, wondering why they were in her dorm anyways.

" Just let us in." Ginny said. The two girls sat on Dark's bed and closed the hangings. " We wanna talk!" Ginny put up a ward, the other girls in the dorm were still asleep.

" Yeah, well I wanna sleep." This didn't work.

" You were out in detention really late, you know." Hermione said. Ginny grinned.

" Yeah, well, I had to scrub cauldrons." Dark was anoyed at the smart looks on their faces.

" Is that it? " Ginny asked. she went on about how Harry told her about the room of requirements and how long Dark was there after he left. Ginny stressed out the last part. "And he said you were really vague about telling him what happened." Dark sighed at this. Ginny allready knew about her crush after all.

With a lopsided grin, she said " Yeah. You figured me out, but really nothing much happened." she assured.

" What so kissing is nothing?"

" Well, nothing more than that." She said truthfully.

" But him ?" Hermione asked. Ginny looked at Hermione disaprovingly.

" I don't see a problem. " she said. Dark knew Ginny wasn't bothered by Her odd crush, but she probably should be.

Later on at breakfast, Dark got a package in the mail. It was from Fred and George Weasley. Praying that nothing would blow up in her face, she opened the box. inside was a old leather pirate's hat and a note. The note read:

" Dearest Dakota,  
Upon finishing and perfecting our new product for the joke shop, we figred you would like a free sample of our newest model. We have improved our vanishing head hats and they now come in a variety of styles. We figured you would like this one. We know that you will use this to it's fulledst potential. With love, Fred and George Weasley."

Dark smiled at her new hat. It was a shame that you wouldn't be able to see the hat when she wore it, because it was quite a handsome pirate's hat. ( It looked like Jack Sparrow's) She slipped it into her book bag, and was on her way to charms class.

There was no potions class today. That was probably a good thing, because Dark would probably blush when she saw Professor Snape. She finished her classes in her usual Monday style. Barely awake. She spent her break before dinner replicating the hat, making it more of a rich carmel color. She would be able to tell the two apart. She liked the style of the hat so much that she wanted a visible one. When the dinner bell rang, she tied her blsck hair in a red bandanna and jammed the non-dissapearing hat on her head. She took the other one with her, because she hoped she could use it later that night.

Her new style was rewarded by many compliments as well as odd looks, but what else was new? After dinner, Dark skipped down the halls singing ' Yo ho, Yo ho, A Pirates Life For Me'.

" We're rascals scoundrals, villans and knaves. Drink up me hearties yo ho... huh?" Dark heard footsteps she peered around a corner to see Snape at a distance. Quickly, she took the Weasley twins hat out of her shoulder bag and stuffed her other hat in the bag. She waited until her dear Professor was standing in front of her.

" Ahoy." She said.

Severus looked at her questioningly. She looked at a spot behind hm, causing him to get paranoid and turn around to look. When he turned around he was shocked. Dark's head was missing!

" Aaargh! Dakota!" He yelped. Dark fell over, as was expected of a headless person. Severus quickly knelt dows to her level, not knowing what to do. After a second of thinking, he slowly reached his hand to her neck. He felt where her head should be, and it was there. He pulled off the hat and saw Dark biting her lip, trying not to laugh. The two stood up.

" Ahahahahaa!... Your face! ..." She gasped between laughs. Snape wasn't amused.

" Miss Smith... What the hell is that thing? " He asked, pointing to the hat. " Nevermind. I don't want to know.. But if you really lose your head, don't expect me to help you out!" He snapped, getting over the scare.

" Ok, when I'm bloodlessly decapitated from out of nowhere, I'll find someone else... " Dark replied smartly.

Severus stood closer. " Ok, my dear, but if you continue with this game, so shall I..." He purred in Dark's ear, sending visible shivers down her spine. He smirked at this, and started to stalk away. He was hit by yet another suprise.

" Sevvie!" Dark called after him, after making sure nobody else could hear that. He stopped, but didn't turn around. " I wanna piggy-back!" He started to walk away, a bit faster. He wasn't fast enough, because Dark took a flying leap and was now clinging to Snape's back. He started to run, not knowiung what to do with her. Dark clung on for dear life.

" Whee!" She squealed, now wearing her spiffy pirate hat.

Severus didn't manage to shake the girl off until passing Lupin's classroom. Professor Lupin watched with amusement as Snape went running by with Dark. They passed the door again, in the opposite direction.

" A little help would be appreciated, Lupin." Severus panted. Look at him! Made a complete fool of. Giving piggy-backs, for the love of Merlin! Lupin's help wasn't much help, but Snape didn't know that it was Remus who tripped him. The two toppled over and Remus chuckled at the sight.

Dark joined Professor lupin for tea, after Severus stalked sorely off.

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( Yay for Pirates! they're my favorite. Um, random question Pirates or Ninjas? or do you hate the whole ting in general, well, i'll see ya next time!)


	23. chapter twenty three

( Long time no update, eh? Well here it is. This chapter was inspired by a comic that DemonofDoom sent me. Thank you! Ok, um I really like this chapter, so I hope you all like it too. I hope to end this fic soon. It's getting long. Thank you all so much for the nice reviews. I like a lot of the ideas and stuff.Natsuyori, The clown idea might have some potential.. Um, clowns are kinda scary so I think it could work out as a good prank. Well, I'll shut up.

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or Snape or anyhting else form the books/movies. Just Dark and that's not much, believe me. ( Dark: Hey! I oughtta hit you!) oops. )

Winter had finally come to an end and it was now April. Unfortunately, that meant lots of rain. During the weekend, the residents of Hogwarts stared longingly out the windows, wishing for nicer weather. Of course, the rain couldn't stop everyone form going out. Quiddich matches and Hogsmeade weekends couldn't be dampened by a little shower. Reagrdless, Dark hated the rain. Nobodly liked getting soaked on their way to herbology class, or having to sit in the canstant drizzle during a quiddich match.

It was a fine April Sunday morning. Dark woke up to rays of sunshine burning into her eyes. The birds were chirping loudly A bit too loudly. Dark stretched and walked to the window. She opened it and the merry chirping grew louder. A cool breeze wafted inand Dark inhaled deeply.

" SHUT UP! Shut up, you infernal rats with wings!" She screamed at the birds. (Always improving those Kodac moments, our Dakota) The chirping stopped abruptly.

Dark smiled with a look of authority until she realized why the birds stopped chirping. It seemed that they took offense easily and were out for revenge. The little buggers were swooping at the window with terrifying speed, screetching like the little devils they were. Dark squeaked with suprise and slammed the window shut just in time. Sounds of thudding, crunching, and feeble squacks were heard throughout the dormitory.

" Jee-eez." Mused Dark, " Alfred Hitchcock was right." Dark did a double take at the window. The sun was out! The rain had stopped. Dark grinned and got dressed, almost forgetting her wonderful three cornered hat.

Bursting out the doors, Dark sped to the grounds. There was still evidence of the recent rain. Mud puddles were scattered all over the lawn. Dark approached one and looked at it for a moment. Who could resist? She pulled off her Chucks and socks and stuck her foot in the mud, feeling it squish in between her toes. She walked in a bit deeper and then decided to make a mud angel. Sitting up, it was a disapointment to find that it didn't come out very well. Dark splashed around a bit longer until she heard someone else outside.

" Miss Smith, what the bloody hell are you doing!" Professor Snape hollared. Dark sat up and looked at him with her head tilted. When Snape said no more, Dark tried to fill the silence by finding her hat in the mud and placing it on her head.

" Miss smith, what are you doing?" Snape tried again.

" Sitting in the mud. What does it look like I'm doing?" Dark answered with the air of doing something completely normal.

Severus looked at her a bit angry, but more confused. He knew that if the girl went into the castle like that, he'd have to once again listen to Filch's long rants about filthy students. Tonight, the term filthy students would be literal. He sighed, exasperated.

" You look grumpy." Dark said. There was a maniacal grin on her face that spelled trouble. " I tink someone needs a hug!" She said, standing up. She was completely covered in mud. Snape made a run for it, but Dark was small and quick. That's why he was suprised at how easily she took him down. She had tackled him like some kind of Muggle sports player. When Severus opened his eyes, he was almost as muddy as Dark was, which Dark found quite amusing. She was laughing hysterically.

Severus put a stop to the laughter, by picking the girl up. So much for small being an advantage now. He thought about what to do.

' Well, throwing her in a mud puddle would be useless." Began his inner monologue. 'But I'm sure that the lake is cold. Freezing, even. ' Snape could envision throwing the whelp intop the lake and watching a little Darkcicle bobbing up and down in the water. His plan set, he took action. Kersploosh.

" SNAPE!" Dark shreiked. " It's friggin' freezing!" She splashed her way out of the lake. She waddled onto the shore with her teeth chattering.

" Sorry, Dakota darling, but you were a mess. " He drawled, his accent thick with sarcasm. " I took care of it, though."

" Yeah, well you missed a spot." Dark snarled, walking towards him.

" Really? Where?" He sneered.

" Right THERE!" She said, shoving him into a mud puddle. Snape sputtered and looked at her in disbelief. How'd she manage that?

' Oh yeah! Ego brought down a notch!' Dark thought with glee as she did a happy victory dance.

Severus stood up and tried towering over her, but she just looked at him defiantly " You know, I am still upset about your little piggy-back charade."

" So?"

" Didn't I warn you about revenge? " No answer. " Well you owe me a ride..."

Dark looked at him funny. " A what!" Severus slapped his forehead.

" You little pervert! Not like that! " He sighed. Dark caught on this time.

" I don't see that working." But she tried, suprised how long she could carry so much dead weight. When she fiunally felt like giving up, she let him fall backwards into another mud puddle. She did the same, earning an 'oof ' from Snape. " Well, that was stupid." Dark muttered.

Severus had to agree with Dark. For a while he just watched her head rise and fall with his chest as she stared at the sky, doodling idly in the mud. Snape picked up a handful of mud ad held it above Dark's face.

" Hey! No- " She snapped, but it was too late. She sat up and frantically wiped the muck off her face, spitting it out as well. " You know, for something that looks like chocolate, mud tastes gross..." She mused.

" You ate mud?" Severus asked laughing.

This irritated Dark. " No, you shoved it in my face!" She elbowed him in the ribs and walked back to the castle. Snape watched after her wondering who would help him up.

That night, just as Severus had predicted, Filch was complaining at him about filthy students. Snape just sighed and continued on his nightly rounds.

( Soo? Hmm? Well? k, the "Rats with wings" quote there, I am pretty sure it came from Spongebob Squarepants, which I DON'T own, so don't hit me! Um, There was an Alfred Hitchcock reference... I don't own him... That'd be weird. Erm REVIEW, please!)


	24. chapter twenty four

(Ah, yet another chapter of this nonsense. Well I hope you all like it. Thank you all for your nice reviews. They really make me happy.

I don't own Harry Potter, Nutella, or, whatever else youm can throw in while I'm at it.)

Severus snickered wickedly as he tiptoed up towards Gryffindor tower. He carried with him two buckets. One filled with glue and the other filled with fluffy white feathers. Ah, it was a classic, so it must be done. He made his way to the four poster bed that a certain scheming girgirl took up residence and set the buckets on the floor. He peered into the curtains to make sure Dark was asleep. A lesson well learned. He was startled to hear her voice, but with relief, she was only mumbling in her sleep.

" ..N-no mommy.. Make the clowns go away.. I don't like... them." She trailed off into a wimper. Severus noticed a cold sweat forming on her brow.

' My my, someone has some clown issues...' Snape mused. All of the sudden, his plan seemed stupid. A new one had started to form in his head. He looked around for a moment looking to see if there was anything that could help put together his sinister plot. On Dark's bedside table there was an assortment of things. One of them could be helpful.

Tissues, no. Pirate action figure. Who was that handsome plastic devil? Wait! A box of grahm crackers? Bingo! Not just grahm crackers, Nutella! There was his bait. He snatched the jar of Nutella, and the two useless buckets, and strolled silently back to his dungeons. How come he never gets caught?

Dark woke up the next morning and yawned. Her unusual collection of stuff greeted her. " Good morning Jack. Good morning pony. Good morning tissue box." She babbled cheerfully, being awake not yet kicking in. She looked at the foot of her bed, where her bunny slept. For a few minutes, she stared blankly at it, wondering how she had aquired all of her random stuff that had collected around her bed. Shrugging, she climbed out of bed and went to find her uniform.

Classes passed by fairly quickly. Not much happened. durning break, she had attempted to start a Neville Longbottom fanclub. That failed miserably, so she got into an interesting discussion with Professor Lupin about things that rhyme with purple. Needless to say it was a short conversation. Interesting, but short.

At the end of the day, Dark walked back from dinner with Hermione. The two were chatting happily.

" Ah, you know what I have been thinking about?" Dark asked.

" No, what?" Hermione answered.

" I have a brand new jar of Nutella and I've been waiting all day to have some." Dark was smiling at the thought of chocolatey Nutella.

" I hope you're sharing."

" Sure!" The two girls reached the common room and hurried up to Dark's dorm, where the'r snack was supposedly waiting. " I have grahm crachers too so-" Dark stopped. "Gone! No way! " Dark looked around frantically.

" What's wrong?" Hermione asked.

" 'Mione! It's.. GONE!" Dark exclaimed. She paused, " Only one person could be behind all of this." Her eyes narrowed dramatically.

"Snape" They said in unison. Dark grabbed her box of crackers and sprinted out of the room. She was on a quest for Nutella.

After about twenty minuted of roaming the school, Dark sighed.

" What's got you down?" a farmilliar voice came from behind her.

Dark turned around to see Molly. She was Jill and Jennless at the moment. " I'm lacking in the Nutella department, sadly." Dark said. " All I have now are these dumb grahm crackers, and there not even the cinamon kind! They're so plain!"

" Oh, well that's a pity." Molly sympathized. " Did someone steal it?" She asked.

"I'm guessing Snape did." Dark frowned. " The jerk. He'll get his."

" Well, if I can I'll help. That creep shouldn't steal other people's snack spread products like that!" Molly offered.

" Nah, not much you can do unless you see it."

Molly nodded and walked off.

It didn't take much time after to stumble upon a clue. There was a big sigh in front of a dark and foreboding door. it read

' Free stuff!...and Nutella' There was an arrow pointing to the door.

" Oh boy! I love free stuff. And Nutella!" Dark squeaked. Without any hesitation she opened the heavy door. It was very dark in the room. " Oh, shit." Dark said, realizing she probably walked into a trap.

Then the music started. Haunting organ music. It played out a circus tune. Dark felt the blood leave her face as the sound made her spine tingle with fear. It reminded her of clowns. A dull light shone in the middle of the room, right on Dark. There were people in the room, sje was surrounded. The light grew stroger, and Dark could see better. She was surrounded by clowns!

" EEEEEAAAAAHHHH!' Dark screamed. She absolutely hated clowns. They were so scary. They danced and juggled around her. Their makeup bloody and twisted. Dark was about to break into tears when the door opened. Snape was standing there. Dark knew he was behind all of this. If she wasn't so afraid, she would have killed him. Instead, she started to run to him. A clown stepped in front of her. With a scream, Dark dove down and through it's legs and clung to Severus for dear life.

" Make them go awaaaaaaaayyyyyyyeeeee!" She cried.

Severus noticed that she was shaking like a leaf. With a wave of the wand it was all gone. It took a while for Dark to realize that the music had stopped. When she finally looked up at Severus, he began to laugh.

" What's so funny!"

" You! Clowns? Merlin, girl, I thought you were braver than that." There was no stopping his laughter. " A Gryffindor!"

" Severus Snape you are the biggest jerk! I can not believe you! Where is my Nutella! Do you realize how NOT funny that was! Argh I can't believe you, you, FREAK!" Apparently, Dark's rage was comical, becuase, Snape was still laughing at her. He handed over the jar of chocolate and wiped his eyes.

Dark just shook her head. " You suck" She said. Still embarassed that she was so afraid of the clowns. It was a major hit to the pride, running to him like that. She left the room and went to find Hermione. She felt the need to share this story and vent. Ginny could come along too.

Severus strolled happily to his office. He was laughing now, but he knew he had it coming.

( There it is! I really do hate clowns. I was traumatized at a young age. If you don't know what Nutella is, it's a chocolate and hazelnut spread. It goes good with pretty much anything. I suggest you try it sometime. Well, actually don't listen to me. oh, wait, listen to me.)


	25. chapter twenty five

( Once again, thank you all for the reviews! I'm still suprised that anyone likes my writing. I hope that this chapter is good too.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything relating to Harry Potter! I only own Dark. )

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Dark lifted her head groggily off of a stack of parchment and a book. She must have fallen asleep. She was in the library studying for N.E.W.T.s. Wiping drool from the cover of her book, she opened it and continued to study. It was hopeless, though. Dark was too tired and restless to study. Her Professors were dealing out the homework heavily, and if this kept up, Dark would end up in St. Mungo's psych ward for sure. All seventh years were feeling the pressure lately. The upcoming tests were nerve racking. The poor half-asleep girl was just about to join the many other seventh yeas who had snapped, and start screaming, ' I'm freakin' out!'

She stood up to leave the library, and once her legs stopped wobbling, she did just that. It was her luck that she just so happened to meet everyone's favorite potions master on the way.

" Ah, Miss Smith. I'm guessing you've finished your potions assignment." He said, hoping to catch her off in a mess like the other students.

" Nope, haven't even started it." The assignment was due the next day and it was now 8:30 at night. Of course, she was kidding about not doing it. Snape looked outraged at her laziness.

" I'm just kidding, geez! I finished your, what was it, seven foot monster essay. You know we're all having nervous breakdowns and you're not helping us much" Dark said, speaking for the entire student body.

" Smith, you're exaggerating. It was only six and a half feet... You'll thank us all for this someday, it builds character." Severus replied dryly.

" Yes it builds us a nice loony persona." Dark muttered bitterly and began to walk away. She turned around after a bit. " You'd better watch your back, Snape. That last little trick of yours was not cool.." She warned.

" That's Professor Snape." He growled, but it went unheard to the girl. Or she was just ignoring him. Severus tried not to take her threat too seriously, but it was better to be prepared. He changed his direction and went to take precautions. Like warding his office. Heck, he'd change his passwords... But of course it wasn't like he, Severus Snape, head of Slytherin, was afraid. No, never. He was just... careful, he felt the need for change, anyways.

" Not in a paranoid manner. " Snape told himself. Poor soul, lost in denial.

Settling in the common room, Dark smiled to herself, knowing that her little plot had to work. If she didn't have the man scared, than she was a Blast Ended Skrewt. Actually she would be dealing with those gorss things in the near future, hopefully. Well, she didn't really hope to be in a five mile radius of one of those, but well, you'll see.

Severus opened the door to his office and entered the room, causing the torches along the walls to ignite. After warding the doors, he turned to an empty wall behind his desk. He tapped the wall with his wand and muttered an incantation that would enable him to change the password to his chambers. He thought for a moment, looking for a random word that nobody would guess.

" Trout" It was the first word to pop into his head. It was only after he said it when he realized how stupid it sounded. Oh well, nobody would guess 'trout', that's for sure. Little did Sev know how wrong he was. He did not see the Quick Quotes Quill that was fast at work in a cluttered corner of his office.

The next day, classes were just as hectic for Dark. The students were being loaded with so much information that they thought their heads would swell up and explode. During transfiguration, one of the Slytherin girls burst into tears and ran from the room clutching her head. That girl was never bright, anyways. Many other episodes like this were scattered throughout the day. Fifth years, who were new to the stress of O.W.L s. were the worst, but the N.E.W.T. s made the other tests seem like nothing. Dark was determined not to crack She came close during Defense Against the Dark Arts, but she was saved by the bell.

Now potions class was next and if Lupin could make a class unbearable, then Dark shuddered to think of what Snape had in store.

For once in her life, Dark wished she was wrong about someting. Potions class was brutal. Lectures, notes, and then a difficult potion. He just had to make the class brew a potion after his lecture! Everyone was half asleep, so a few potions went wrong. This wouldn't have been so bad if Snape hadn't gave the class extra homework because of it. Dark dropped her head down onto her work bench with a loud thud. She was going to find herself a time turner and murder whoever came up with these awful tests.

After the bell rang, Dark shoved her books and notes into her bag and left the classroom. She was hoping that her plan for revenge was going to run smoothly, because Snape was being cruel with the homework.

" Builds character my ass..." She hissed to nobody in particular.

" Language, Smith. And it does." Professor Snape's sudden comment made Dark jump. This would be a good excuse to get that quill and parchment out of his office.

" You are about to cross the line into Get An Earful of Bitchville, Mister!" Dark snapped insolently. She glared, and saw Snape's face grow irritable. Mission accomplished.

" Perhaps we sould have a little chat." He said, motioning towards his office. The two walked in, and Snape leaned by his desk. " You are becoming more and more talk, Smith. I can hardly take your threats seriously." He started. Dark pretended to ignore him by loking at the jars of dimembered parts on the shelves. " But I can see why you're backing down." He continued.

Dark drew nearer to the corner where she left her Quick Quotes Quill as Severus rambled on.

"...nobody can really compare to my cunning..." Dark spotted her quill.

There was a flutter of paper, and the contents of Dark's bag was scattered on the floor. Dark placed a tearing charm on the bottom, so she could pick up the quill unnoticed. She blamed this on Snape.

" What was that for, Professor!" She lied.

" I didn't do that, Smith. I think your bag was too full." He said.

" I wonder why." Dark hissed sarcastically, repairing her bag and shoving everythihng back inside. Now the only problem facing her was re-organizing everyting and finding the password, if her plan worked. " Anyways, are you done going on about how great you are, or whatever you were talking about?" Dark asked, wanting to get to dinner. Severus nodded. "Ok, then, are you going to be a gentleman and walk me down?" She asked

Severus knew something was up. Her mood went from super bitch to normal happy Dark in less than five minutes. All he could do for now was offer an arm, roll his eyes, and head to the great hall.

After dinner, Dark ran up to her dormitory and was digging through her school bag. She set up piles for each subject, and soon she came across the paper that she left in Snape's ofice the night before. She read it eagerly, and then blinked.

" Trout? Ok, well I wasn't expecting that one. You're tricky Snape, but not tricky enough for the notorious Dakota Smith!" Dark let out a maniachal laugh.

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" HAAAARRRYYYYY!" Dark came flying down the stairs and into the common room. " I need your cloak." She said. " It's a good prank this time." There was a glint in her eye.

Harry thought for a moment. " Alright, let's hear it. I want to hear the whole plan, because if it ends up like last time we took the cloak..." Dark cut him off.

" Fine ok!" Secret agent music played in the background. " Nine thirty PM, Professor Snape is in the east second floor corridor doing his patrolling rounds. We scuttle down to Hagrid's and snatch a Blast Ended Skrewt. We place it into this crate." For dramatic effect, she slammed the crate down on the table they were sitting at. " We take said crate to Snape's office. We enter his chambers through the wall behind his desk using this password." She waved the parchment in front of Harry's face. " And I sneak in, find Snape's underwear drawer, and slip in the skrewt. We get out before eleven o' clock and we're home safe!" Dark finished.

Harry gaped at her. " That's brilliant... Or suicide. How do you know where he'll be?" He asked.

" I've been sneaking down the corridors for a long tijme now. I'm quite sneaky and cunning...Oh, plus I snagged a look at Snapey's schedule..." Dark told him. " Look, you don't have to help me. I can pull this off all by me onesies" ( I love that word!) Dark looked at Harry with puppy eyes. " I just need your cloak at least." She begged. Oh yeah, she broke him.

" Fine. I'll come, even. I know Hagrid better than you do, anyways. You just better be right about this." He gave in. It was settled! The two waited until nine fifteen, grabbed the cloak, and ran out to the grounds as fast as they could while managing to be stealthy.

The two reached Hagrid's hut and crept around to the back. It was lucky that Hagrid had grown fon of the Skrewts and kept some for himself. Who else besides Hagrid could grow fond of something with an exploding butt? They snatched a small one in the crate and Dark slipped a note under the door of the hut. On walking back to the castle, Harry asked a worried question.

" Dark, when Snape finds this, he's going to know it was you. He'll be mad. Did you think of the consequences?" He asked.

" Don't worry. It's personal now. Besides, do you think he wants anyone to know that a student snuck past his wards? He'd be embarrased about it. Especially the location of the skrewt. Why would he tell anyone?" Dark said as they reached the front doors.

Reaching the potions office, Dark and Harry peered inside. The coast was clear. They hurredly entered and shut the door silently. Checking her watch, Dark saw that it was ten.

" We have one hour. I think we'll be ok." She said. It wasn't hard to find Snape's wardrobe. It was hard to make Harry stop making gagging noises whn they found the drawer they were looking for. Dark laughed. She saw that most of the pairs of shorts were either all black or green with little Slytherin logos on them. Opening the crate, they slipped the slimy thing into the drawer. They quickly slammed it shut, because well, those creatures were down right unpleasant to look at. The two ran as fast as they could back to Gryffindor tower.

" All right! We did it! High five!" Dark said as they got there. She raised her hand and they slapped high five. " Look what I brought back!" Dark said brightly. She held up a pair of silk boxers with little green and silver 'S's on them. " Talk about a panty raid!" Dark laughed. Harry could only gag and attempt to scratch his eyes out.

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Severus woke up the next morning feeling as tired as usual. The thing that woke him up was the smell of smoke. It was coming from his dresser! He ran over and opened the smoking drawer. It was his underwear drawer. He yelped at the sight of the Skrewt. After ten panicked minutes, he resolved to cage the thing. Then he looked at the damage.

" Bloody hell! My skivvies are on fire!" He wailed. The lesson learned: Expect trouble when you mess with the incredible force that is Dakota Smith!

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( So there you have it! Revenge is sweet. Please review, it makes me happy.)


	26. Chapter 26

(I know, slow updates. Don't worry. One more day of finals and I am free for the summer! I hope to finish this one soon. I probably wont let it go more than 30 chapters. This is a short one. I have gotten inspiration this weekend, so I just had to finish this one as kind of a filler. Well, actually, this chap had a vital message, but now I'm rambling. Go on, read!)

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" Have you seen Dark, yet? " Harry asked Ron, laying on the floor of the Gryffindor common room.

" No. But she's been prancing around with her newest oddities.." Ron answered from a plush armchair

" Well, I hope Snape hasn't caught her. When he returned that Skrewt to Hagrid, he was shown the note Dark left. Hagrid only showed it to the git, becuase he thought Dark meant Snape was going to bring it back for her. Ol' Snapey went balistic... What do you mean by odities, mate?"

"Not sure really, they looked like pirate effects, knowing Dark. A sword and spyglass to go with her hat. " Ron told Harry.

The portriat hole swung open, letting Hermione into the room. " Have you seen Dark? I've just seen Professor Snape messing with her pirate gadgets." She asked. Ron and Harry looked at eachother.

"Er.."

Soon, the trio's attention drifted away from Dakota Smith and onto more important matters. For example: Anything besides Dakota Smith. That was until she so rudely shoved her way back into the discusion.

" I will kill that man!" Dark stormed into the room there was a black ring around her right eye. Answering the questioning looks her friends gave her, she huffed, " He put ink rings around the eyepiece of my telescope!" There was no need to clarify who "he" was.

She continued. "You know what I told him? I says, ' That is it! This will end. I will either pull the prank to top all pranks or I give up!' And then he's all like, ' Best give up, then Smith. I will have the last laugh. And when I do this war will be over. ' Can you beleive that smug arse-head!" Dark's face was red now. She had actually done a remarkable impression of Snape, though.

The next few days were filled with senseless pranking,. nothing worthy enough to be called "The prank to top all pranks", although shaving off Snape's eyebrows was almost up there. Dark, with much pride, would tell the story over and over. It's really one worth hearing.

" So, I pulled the ol' super cool spy trick where you get a room's password via Quick Quotes Quill. ( My brilliant-ness in it's prime) One would think he'd have found that one out, well, maybe he did this time, but on with the story. With my cunning pirate skills (no I don't mean ninja skills), I snuck into his room when he was asleep. Really, it was too easy, although I had a bit of trouble not waking him up by jumping on his bed. How fun would that have been?  
Right, well I went to breakfast the next morning and I was suprised he was actually there. But he was all 'keep my head down-y', so later that day, while he was telling me off for de-eyebrowing him (In those exact words, I swear!) I told him I'd fix it. Fixing it actually turned out to be sharpie-ing him some spiffy new eyebrows."

Amazingly enough, the marker brows are still there on Severus's head as he contemplates his next move. When Dark happily assumed that he must have really enjoyed her artwork, he just glared and told her that it was because they wouldn't come off.

So where was I? Oh yes, the next few days were full of petty tricks and so on. Dark was sporting a green sharpie mustache and goatee, Snape had drawn on squiggly eyebrows, and neither of them had pulled off the Mega Prank. They were planning. This one had to be good. Today, they were so wrapped up in their mission, that they had no time for anything other than immature name calling.

" You crazy little midget pirate lover!"

" You evil billowy thing!"

" You immature name-caller!"

" Why do you sound so out of character, Sev!"

" Because our writer is lazy. And I am stooping to your level with all of this ridiculous name calling. But mostly because our writer is lazy." Severus glared nastily at the terrible author, who in return hung her head in shame.

And so it was silently agreed between the two of them.No, not that the author sucks, but that it was now finally on. A race to the ultimate prank. It had to be good. Good enough to make the other back down and surrender.

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( So the race is on. Who will win? Will it be Dark? Snape? Like hell I'll tell you! Anyways, I have the end in my mind. It will be good. I just needed a chapter to kinda start the end. Anyways, I love all of you! Your reviews make me happy. Review, please! Love, Mole (yes, that's me) )


	27. Chapter 27

(Hi again. I hope this hasn't been too bad of a wait. Thank you all for your super cool reviews. I love to hear what you have to say. I'm hoping to end this story by 30 chapters. It will be sad to end, but I must move to other things. In this chapter, there is a term that will need a definition, you'll know when you see it. It will be provided at the bottom of the page. I hope you all will find the humor in it, but I dunno... It was a spur of the moment kind of thing on a trip with my friends. Ok, I'm rambling, READ NOW!))

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We find our brave yound heroine digging around the potions master's private potions storage. You see, she needed information. She needed to know what it would take to make him fall. A prank involving a childhood embarassment, or maybe something less cruel. But the only way to find out would be to question the man himself.

"Aha." Dark whispered to herself, closing her fingers around a small vial of Veritaserum she poured a small amount of the contents into one of her own vials, and quickly fled the scene of the crime.

It was a calm Friday afternoon, the springtime at it's warmest. Dakota Smith strolled the school's corridors. She was looking for a way to casually bump into Snape. She was on the second floor when she spotted him. He just turned into another corridor and Dark was not fast on his tail. She was just about to jump at him from behind, when he quickly turned around.

"Fancy seeing you here, Professor." Dark beamed at him.

"Indeed. may I ask what you want from me?"

"Ouch. I just wanted to hang out. Have a nice drink of tea or something." She said.

"Fine, would you like to join me in my office." He didn't trust her. If he was going "hang out" he wasn't going to let her handle anything he'd eat.

" Erm, I was thinking more like the kitchens. Ask the house elves. No offense Snape, but wouldn't drink anything you gave me." Dark said, formulating her plan in her head. Snape seemed to t hink this was a suitable plan, because he began to walk towards the kitchens. Dark followed. Soon, they were sitting at a small wooden table with three house elves grinning toothily at them.

"What can we get you, Professor Snape Sir and Miss Dakota?" One of them squeaked.

"I'll have a cup of tea. No sugar." Severus answered. So typical.

"Do you have Coca-cola?" Dark asked. She smiled when The little elf nodded enthusiastically. "I'll have some of that then, please." She said, giving a smug "Yeah, I'm more polite than you" look to Severus, who glared in return. " Sevvie dear, that's really not becoming of you." She informed him. A growl was her response. As soon as the mob of overly happy elves left, Dark stood up. "Oh! I forgot." She said.

"What?" Snape asked grumpily.

"We need pizza." She said in an obvious tone. She scurried out of site to where the house elves were cooking and Severus snorted. Pizza. Once out of earshot, she said to the elf that was getting their drinks. "Um, Professor Snape would like some of this in his tea." She took out the vial of stolen Veritaserum. "He's feeling under the weather and this will help. Don't mention it, though. He'd rather pretend he's invincible." She winked at the house elf, who in turn tapped the side of his little nose knowingly. "Oh, and would it be any trouble to ask for some pizza?"

"Of course not. What is it you wish to be on it?" He squeaked.

Dark thought for a second. "Um, mushrooms, sausage, bacon, and oh, green peppers." She hoped that wasn't too much, but the house elf looked happy still, so she thanked him and went to sit again.

"What took you so long? It's just pizza." Severus snorted.

"It needed toppings, Sevvie-kins." Dark loved to call him names. It made his eye twitch. She couldn't help but flash a heart melting smile. Wait, does that work on Snapes? Dark realized that it almost did. Wait, you! No fraternizing with the enemy! Dark was about to say something, when the drinks came. Dark grinned. Showtime!

Dark drained half of her Coke, while Severus was about to take his first sip. He put the teacup to his lips and took a long sip. Then he looked up at Dark with a spacey expression. "Dakota... did you..?" He asked, recognizing the symptoms as an effect of the truth potion.

"Sev. Tell me about your past. You know. Dumb mistakes." Time to get some dirt. There had to be some pranking material in there.

"I was young and foolish. It was a terrible decision. Dark times..." She droned, almost dramatically.Dark sighed.

"No! I know you were a Death Eater. I meant-..." She was cut off.

"No! Worse!" He exclaimed. "I got into the muggle sport of... Motorcycling."

"Motorcycling? You on a Harley?" Dark asked, dumbfounded.

"Yes. I went to Laconia New Hampshire's Bike Week. It was a - a leather nightmare!"

Dark gasped "No!"

" Yes, but that's not all! I wore...I wore these leather chaps." He looked down at the table "Chaps? That's it? Well, that's not too bad. I mean I'd like to see your ass in a pair of chaps." Dark started, but saw the look on Snape's face. He looked ashamed. "Wait. Sev. Tell me you followed the 'Chap Rule' (A/N)" Severus said nothing. He had a pained look in his dark eyes. "You didn't!" Dark was bewildered. "You can't wear chaps without followng the 'Chap Rule'! I mean. You have the ass for them! WHY! You could have..Should have!" Dark was almost yelling.

The pizza was on the table, now. Dark sympathetically handed Severus a slice. He took it, and Dark ate one as well. She spent the rest of the time that the potion was still in effect to ask silly question that Snape had to answer. Didn't have the heart to use the chap info against him... No. He was young and stupid. The poor miserable creature.

"Sev? Am I cuuuute?"

"I think so... DAMNIT!"

"Hehehe. Do you like bunnie rabbits?"

"Deep down inside of me, I really do. I like their twitchy noses."

Dark nearly choked on her pizza, but at least it was worth it. Severus however, was now determined that she would not pull the ultimate prank. No matter what it took. He had a plan, for he knew a weakness. Erm, other than himself, that was. It was: Ninjas. The bane of her existance.

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The next day at breakfast, Dark sat at the Gryffindor table looking a bit distressed. What could she do for the best prank? The choices on the list now looked dumb and futile. Not worthy enough to be crowned the master prank. Harry looked at her, knowing of her information hunt.

"Find anything?" He asked.

"Nothing that I have the heart to use on him. The poor thing." She sighed. Harry thought this had something to do with the Death Eaters. If only he knew the true horrors. Bike Week. It made Dark shudder. Especially the sad condition of poor young Severus's behind.

The day went by with lots of N.E.W.T.s review. It was only two weeks away. The last class of the day was potions. Dark felt worried, knowing that she was coming up with no plans of prank action. She had been too busy with studying, and now she needed a miracle, or she'd face defeat. She knew that Snape would do anything to keep her from pulling said prank. She wondered how drastic his actions would be. He was definately set to stop her. He couldn't lie under the potion, and she did ask:

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"So, the ultimate prank. You think ou stand a chance."

"Dakota, you should know that I won't be made a fool of again. You won't win. It's about victory to me, not pranks."

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And so, as the flashback shows, Dark had reason to worry. She sat in the back of the class, and pulled on her pirate bandanna and tri-cornered hat. She also wore brown leather boots. She looked like a pirate in a school uniform, or better put, a weirdo. She didn't care, though. She wanted to at least try to distract Snape. She had just finished tying a red fringed sash to her waste when the Professor slammed the doors to the room and lept in. Dressed like a...ninja!

Dark's eyes narrowed dangerously as soon as she saw him. "Avast, ye scurvy ninja scum!" She cried, jumping onto her desk. she held her wand in one hand as if it were her cutlass. Severus pulled out his wand (no, not that one! ERLACK!) And held it over his head with two hands as he charged at his pirate foe.

"Hiiiiiiyyyyyeeeeeeaaaaahhh!" He leaped into the air, and onto the desk next to Dark's, sending some unfortunate loser toppling out of his seat. Dark launched into attack, and started a sword fight. There was a lot of jumping from desk to desk, and Dark had just about defested Snape, when the doors to the room opened. Standing in the doorway was none other than Albus Dumbledore himself. And there was a lack of twinkle involved.

Uh, oh...

((A/N CHAP RULE: To wear chaps, you must have a) An arse to fill said chaps and b) Pants that give form to aforementioned arse, because you can't go around with a flat flap of jeans just hanging there! Well, unless you have a rather unsightly bottom...then wait, why would you wear chaps? It's just a given that you need an arse to wear chaps.

This rule was mde on the trip I mentioned. We were on Lake Winnapasaukee (spelling!) on bike week. We saw this guy that looked like Snape! It was messed up, so of course we needed a background story. Oh, and he broke the chap rule... Yep, keep reading, please!))

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(Ok, my loveley readers, tell me what you think! It seems our Dark might be in some trouble. Hm... Oh, I think that you should check this author out. She's my pal and she is tres funny! 

Jilene Marr has a new HP story, it's pretty origional. She also has a POTC, Edward Scissorhands, Secter Window, Village. Gee, am I forgetting any? Well, check her out. Oh, and check out my other stories if you havent. There aren't too many, but I'm working on it.

Thank you! Love, Mole)


	28. Chapter 28

(Let's see what kind of trouble Dark has gotten herself into. The end of this story is coming quickly. I'm sorry if this Chapter is a bit short, but yeah, I think you'll be surprised. There's a little bit of cussin' in this chapter, but nothing too serious. just thought you'd like to know. READ NOW)

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Dark sat in Dumbledores office, looking at her shoes. Snape and Dumbledore were outside speaking, and it was taking forever. By the time they both returned, Dark had noiced evert detail of her boots about a hundred times over. The two men took their seats. Dumbledore sat behind his desk and Snape sat in the chair nedt to Dark. The looks the two were giving her made Dark squirm uncomfortably. She really belw it this time. Her eyes trailed back to her shoes, but they snapped back up as Dumbledore began to speak.

"Miss Smith. That was quite a serious action. You attacked a professor." He said gravely. Dark wanted so badly to tell him that Snape had started it, but knew that would make things worse. "I let your small pranks slip, but this went too far. You know a form of punishment is required." Dark nodded, not trusting herself to speak. "I'm afraid to say..." He paused and looked at her. "Lemon drop?" Damnit would the man just get it over with. Dark silently took a sweet and awaited her sentence. "I fear you must be expelled." Professor Dumbledore said.

Dark began coughing and gasping loudly, clutching her throat. Severus turned his head to look at her. Was she crying? He noticed that she was turning blue and he jumped out of his seat. "Miss Smith!" More gasping. "Dakota!" He exclaimed. She was choking on the Lemon Drop! Severus didn't notice Albus stand up and point his wand at the girl, but soon there was a jolt of blue light, and the lemon drop came shooting out of her mouth. "ARGH!"

"ARGH!" Normally in the situation, Dark would laugh. She hit poor Severus square on the forehead with the hard candy. But seeing as she had just been expelled from Hogwarts, she felt more like crying. "Ex-expelled? Professor Dumbledore... N.E.W.T.s are just next week. You can't... you... no..." She was at a loss for words. This had to be a bad, bad dream.

"I'm sorry, Miss Smith." He said coldly. "Now I have to speak with Professor McGonagall." He flooed out of his office, leaving Dark alone with Severus. He was just looking at her blankly. He got her expelled and wouldn't even appologise! Damn him. Damn that man!

"Miss Smith, are you crying?"

" PISS OFF!" Snape just raised an eyebrow.

"Dakota Smith, you must watch your language. And I told you you wouldn't pull that prank." Dark couldn't beleive what she was hearing. He expelled her over a prank that didn't even happen.

" You... You're crazy! Insane!" Dark managed. Snape just gave her a maniacal grin. "Oh my gosh! I actually drove you insane!" Our unfortunate heroine was now quite scared, being stuck in a room with a madman. Without thinking, she jumped out of her chair and ran for the door. She would have made it out if she remembered that doors needed to be opened. "AH! OW! Shit door face ow!" Dark groaned with her face smashed against the door. "I'm a dope..." She felt someone grab her arm and pull her back to her seat. Of course it was Snape. "Don' touch me Crazy McInsanelson!" She hissed. After a few minutes of uncomfortable silence, Dumbledore returned with Professor McGonagall. They both looked grave.

"Miss Smith, I am very dissapointed in you. I thought you to be a model student. You are to return here tomorrow morning at ten o' clock. We will discuss your expulsion further." She said stiffly. Dark couldn't help it. She had to say something.

"Professor, please! I really didn't do anything that bad! I can't have gone to school and worked so hard for all these years and then at the very end get chucked out!" She tried. After getting no response, she tried her last resort. "But he started it!" She whined, pointing to Severus.

"Now really, I expect better from you, Dakota!" McGanagall snapped.

Dark glared at Snape. "Fine, but I have something to say about Professor Snape, then." Dark said. Snape paled. She was going to get him in trouble! Seeing the panic on Snape's face, she smirked and continued. "He got mixed up in motor bikes and wore chaps without following the chap rule!" Dark stated. The two older professors gasped, and Snape sighed in releif before blushing shamefully.

"I was young!" He defended himself.

Then Dakota ran out of the room to go cry her poor little eyes out and stuff her face with chocolate ice cream. Things were looking pretty bad for her.

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(WOAH! Who saw that coming? What will our Darkie do? How will she live now? Will anyone ever let Snape live that chaps thing down? Find out next time. Same bat time, Same bat channel! I have the next chap in the works, so it will be up very soon!)


	29. Chapter 29

(Let's see how Dark will live after being expelled. This should be fun! It mightbe a bit short. What is it with me and short chapters? )

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It was one in the morning, and Dark could not sleep. She still found it herd to believe. She had gotten herself expelled. Wouldn't her parents be pleased? She crawled out of bed and with puffy red eyes, dug through her trunk. She pulled out the list and crept down to the common room. The word "Expelled" kept buzzing in her mind. She crumpled the list in her fist and threw it into the fire. Watcing it burn reminded her of her own school career. Once a huge goal, now just a piece of crap going up in flames. She sat down heavily on the couch and stared at the fire, feeling her ees get droopy.

The hustle and bustle of students woke Dark up. She had fallen asleep in the common room. Hoping it was still early, she checked her watch. It was only seven thirty. She ran up the stairs to her dormitory to go get ready. Looking like a slob would not help her...If she could be helped. She soon regretted going to her room. The other girls spotted her and thus began the interrogation.

"I heard you got expelled!" Ooh, tactful!

"What did you do!"

"Did you really almost kill Snape?" What were people saying!

Dark groaned and bolted for the bathroom to change and clean up. It took forever to wipe away the tear smudges from her eyes. It was a streaky mess, especially since she fell asleep that way.

Two and a half hours later, Dark found herself knocking on the door to the Headmaster's office. "Enter" She took a deep breath and pushed the large door open. Sitting in the room were Sanpe, McGonagall, and Dumbledore, all glaring at her. Dark's palms began to sweat. Did they tell her parents yet? was the Ministry going to come and snap her wand in two? For a moment, she had forgotten to breathe.

"Have a seat, Miss smith." Professor Dumbledore ordered. Dark did so and looked helplessly at the witch and wizards before her. "Before we notify your parents and the Ministry, Professor Snape has something to say to you." Dumbledore said.

Severus stood up. "Dakota, I told you that you wouldn't beat me. Nobody outdoes Severus Snape. I got you soooo bad!" Dark blinked. What? "I said, GOTCHA!" Snape shouted. Somewhere in the background music started playing and everyone in the room began to laugh. Dark was in shock and couldn't register what was happening. Well, until Ashton Kucher leaped in form out of nowhere.

"Yeeeaaaahhhhhh! You've been punk'd. BIIOOOCH!" Everybody stopped and glared at Ashton. Severus snatched the trucker hat off of his head and threw it across the room. Ashton's lower lip trembled. Knowing he wan't wanted, he walked off dejectedly. "I'll just go back to MTV, then..."

"Oh man! You were kidding? You set all of this up, Professor?" Dark asked Snape. He nodded. "Wow. That is the ultimate prank. I-Ican't top that. Darn..." Dark knew she lost. "Fine, you win. But now I get to complete my Hogwarts education, at least." She tried to be positive.

"But you can't complete it and be a winner!" Severus bragged. He was so happy to have actually won.

"Shut it. You caused me some psychological damage on that one. I was crying my eyes out last night!" Dark snapped. This made Snape laugh.

"Hah! Well that's what you get for pestering me."

"I have to study.'Bye." Dark said blankly, she was still freaked out. She could not believe it was over. And she lost.

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(Another twist! Well. this is pretty much the end. The next chapter just kind of wraps things up. Please, tall me what you think!

Love, Mole)


	30. Chapter 30

(Ok, last chapter! Are you psyched? I am! I tried to make this chapter, well I guess the word would be cute, almost. I really don't know. It's a happy ending. Read on, lovely readers!)

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Severus was lying half asleep in a spare room at Grimauld place. It was five in the morning and he was pondering upon past events. The past really seemed crazy hen you were slipping between being awake and asleep. Graduation had been a week ago for the seventh years of Hogwarts. After the ceremony, Severus and Dark had made it pretty clear that there were no hard feelings over what happened. Or at least they hoped there weren't any. Doesn't a snog-athon just say forgiveness?

Snape was about to drift back to sleep when he was rudely jolted awake by a sudden movement. Somebody had just jumped on his bed. "RISE AND SHINE SEVVY, DEAR! WAKEY WAKEY!"shouted Dark with laughter in her voice. "It's allready five! You lazy bones!" She siad, still jumping on the bed.

"Stop that..." Severus groaned. "Who let you in here?" Dark didn't stop.

"I let myself in. And I don't feel like stopping? Naa naaa!" Dark started giggling.

Severus knew how to make it stop. "Hm... I wonder what this sounds like from downstairs or next door." He pondered out loud. Dark stopped jumping and landed on Severus's back. "Ouch" He groaned. "So you just invited yourself in here?"

"Yep. And I'm tired." Dark said.

"So I suppose you'll just invite yourself in?" Snape asked.

"Move over, you shouldn't complain." That was true. Dark shoved Sev over and settled in as if she owned the place.

"I ought to tell your mother. You are a rude little thing!" Severus said.

"EW! You sound old! Don't do that." Dark whined. "Speaking of my mum..."

"I'll sound like a creep!" Severus said. Dark just hugged him.

"Nah, I'll take care of it, Sev. Trust me, I'm an expert at everyting!" Snape rolled his eyes.

Later, Dark sat in the kitchen, speaking to her mom. She had finally returned from home to be at headquarters for the summer. Dark always loved to gossip with her mother, as sad as that sounded. It was almost second natre talking about guys. "So mom, what If I had a crush on someone who I wasn't able to date until, say, a week ago like..."

"Honestly Dakota. Make it more obvious you were digging a Professor!" The two women were remarkably alike. both tres tactful! "Oh, but who? Is it Remus, he's a cutie!" Dark let her head thud onto the table.

"Guess again, Ma..." She mumbled. At that moment, Severus himself came strolling into the kitchen for somehting to eat.

"Good day, ladies." He said in his usual Snape voice. Dark's head snapped up from the table.

"No..." Dark's mother said out of disbelief, but not in disapproval.

"ChhYeahhhh..." Dark assured.

"What?" Severus asked, very confused at the cryptic conversation going on.

"Go away!" Both women said in unison. Severus grabbed an apple and left the kitchen, muttering.

"Like mother, like daughter. Honestly..."

"Well Dakota, do you really think that could work? I mean, you could try it. What would he say?"

" You should show some confidence in me, Ma. I'll ask him out now, even!" Dark said stubbornly. "Professor!" She called.

Severus entered the room again. "No need, Miss Smith. I'm not your Professor anymore." He said.

"Fine then. But what about the 'Miss Smith' thing? Anyways Severus, Could I have a word, um, in private?"

"Of course, Dakota." The two left the room, but not before Dakota and her mother exchanged thumbs ups behind Sev's back.

"My daughter, she'd a bold one..." Dark's mother chuckled to herself. If only she knew...

**The End**

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(Well, there you have it! I hope you enjoyed my story! I had fun with it, but all things must end sometimes. I want to thank you all for your awesome reviews. Woah, am I going to get emotional? Anyways, thanks!

Love, Mole)


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